Rock Bottom
by liviblue
Summary: Andy's relationship with Tommy is in shambles; who will be there to help her through? Will she finally open up?  Andy/Sam/Tommy
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: **This story is very personal to me, my father battled addiction and on March 10th it will be six years since he died. I can identify with Andy's struggle to deal with her father's addiction, and I'm hoping I can portray that in this story. Hope you like it, even if it does start out kind of dark.

CHAPTER 1

Andy stood in front of the mirror and brushed her fingertips across the scar on her shoulder. That night, that moment, it was on a constant loop in her head, but she wanted nothing more than to forget it entirely.

_*Flashback*_

"_DAD!" Andy said, as she beat on the door of his apartment, "…DAD! Open the door!"_

_Nothing._

_She had called him several times; his phone went straight to voicemail._

_She went to the fire escape and climbed to his window, she was ashamed at how habitual this had become. _

_Andy checked to see if the window was unlocked, and to her surprise, it was. She assumed it was because her father was sick of having to replace it when Andy had to break in when he drank himself half-dead._

_The apartment was a mess, completely ransacked. Cautiously, she searched each room until she found her father passed out on the floor of his bedroom, clutching his gun. _

"_Please wake up," she shook him, panicked. _

_Startled, Tommy McNally drew his gun and pulled the trigger. _

_The impact knocked Andy into the wall before she fell to the ground._

"_Andy!" Tommy exclaimed, once he snapped out of his drunken daze and realized what he had done. _

_Within seconds, Oliver was standing in Tommy's apartment after having broke the door down, radioing dispatch for an ambulance, "…Officer down."_

_*End Flashback*_

To Andy's knowledge, her father had been attending his AA meetings regularly; to Andy's knowledge, her father was sober.

_Wishful thinking._ She pulled her shirt over her head, covering the scar. The idea of going through the intrusive psychological therapy she knew was looming in the near future made her nauseous. _What makes people think it's therapeutic to open up and spill your guts to some stranger? _The doctor knocked on the door before entering, "…okay Miss McNally, everything looks great. The wound healed nicely. You may still be sore for a couple weeks, but nothing too bad. Take it easy on your left arm."

"What about work? Can I work?" she asked, anxiously. She felt like she was suffering from cabin fever. Her apartment was too small to be in 24/7, she felt like she was developing claustrophobia.

"I don't see why not, but nothing too strenuous. I'd imagine after something like this your staff sergeant will have you on desk for a while anyway," he replied.

"Yeah, he will," she said, her disappointment clear.

The doctor laughed, "…that's a good thing, for now anyway. Baby it for at least another week; you don't want to be out any longer than you have to, right?"

"Right," Andy answered.

"Okay, I want to see you again in a week. Keep taking your antibiotics, there is still a window for infection and keep your pain medication on hand. If the pain worsens though, call me so we can get you in," he said, as he handed her the yellow papers and a new prescription.

"Thank you," Andy said as she stood up.

"As far as physical therapy is concerned, I don't see it as necessary at this point, but we'll see how this next week goes," he said as he opened the exam room door.

"Okay."

He started to walk out but turned around to say one last thing, "…I'm serious about the taking it easy. You could seriously hurt yourself, be careful."

"I will, I promise," she said with a laugh as she followed him out the door.

* * *

She sat in the parking lot; staring at the big gray building she dreaded entering. _This is a pointless waste of my time; there is nothing this person is going to be able to tell me about myself and my problems that I do not already know. _She looked at the clock and realized she would late if she did not make her way inside soon.

Her phone starting ringing. _Luke. _

Andy hit ignore, opened the door and walked inside. _Third floor, Suite 211. _She walked up the stairs and all the way down the hallway; when she reached the doorway, she froze.

_If you ever want to work the streets again, you have to do this. _She opened the door and walked up to the desk, "…can I help you?" the disturbingly cheery woman asked.

"I have a 1:00 appointment with Dr. Graham," she said.

"And your name is?"

"Andy McNally," she answered.

"Ah, yes. Fill out these forms, and she'll be with you shortly," the woman handed Andy a clipboard and pointed towards the uncomfortably small sitting area.

"Thanks," she turned around and sat between a woman who was crying hysterically, and a man whose leg was bouncing at a mile a minute. Andy attempted to ignore the things going on around her by answering the questions on the form. _Are you suicidal? Do you do things to cause yourself physical harm? Do you ever find it hard to get out of bed? Is it hard for you to find meaning in your life?_

Andy read over the questions with disgust. _No, no, no, no. I do not belong here! I am not suicidal, a little out of my mind ever so often, but not suicidal. _She circled 'no' to all the questions, filled in her person information and then sat silently, forced to listen to the sobbing woman to her right.

"Andy?" a woman asked, as she opened the door.

Andy couldn't jump out of her chair quick enough, not that it would be much better in her office.

"I'm Dr. Graham, but you are more than welcome to call me Diane, please take a seat," she motioned to the couch.

"I don't have to lie down, do I?" Andy asked.

"That's completely up to you, whatever makes you comfortable," she answered.

Andy sat up straight with her hands on her knees, uneasy as ever.

"So, Andy, tell me why you're here," she said.

"I'm here because I have to be if I want to work the streets again," she replied sharply.

"But why?" Diane asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Why can't you work the streets?" she elaborated.

"Because their afraid I may be _emotionally unstable,_ whatever that means," Andy said.

"Why might you be emotionally unstable?"

Andy knew. She did not want to say it aloud though, she was comfortable forgetting about it; acting as if it never happened.

"Andy…"

"Because my father shot me," she said, holding back tears.

"Why did your father shoot you?" Diane asked.

"Because he was drunk, and I scared him," she answered, still choking back tears.

"How did that make you feel?" she asked.

"Disappointed," Andy said, straightening up. _Hurt, angry, confused._

"Disappointed? That's it?"

"Yeah," she answered.

"I think we've got a long road ahead of us, Officer McNally," she said.

_Perfect._

* * *

_Twice a week, for God knows how many weeks, I cannot do this, _Andy thought to her as she walked out.

Once she got in the car, she checked her phone: four missed calls and two voicemails.

Luke. Luke. Traci. Luke.

Assuming both the voicemails were from Luke, she deleted them without listening; she called Traci back.

"Hello?" Traci answered.

"Hey, Trace."

"Andy, how'd it go?"

"It went, it's over. I wish I didn't have to go back," she said.

"I'm sorry it was bad," she said, "…so what's the verdict, can you come back?"

"Yeah, I'll be there tomorrow, I think. On desk, of course. I still need to call Best and sort out the details," she said, the only bright side was that she was able to go back to work.

"Good! We miss you!"

"I miss you, too!"

"Look, Andy, I hate to cut this short but I kind of snuck off and left Noelle alone, but you should come by the Penny tonight," she said.

"Maybe, I'll talk to you later Trace."

"Come to the Penny, I gotta go."

Andy hung up the phone, she had avoided just about everyone over the last month. She pulled up in front of a familiar house, the shiny silver truck in the driveway. She had avoided _almost_ everyone.

* * *

**A/N: **Let me know what you think, reviews will probably determine how far this story really goes.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: **Thank you so much for the reviews! Sorry it's taken me a couple days to update, I've been insanely busy with a project for one of my classes, but it's done and so is Chapter 2!

CHAPTER 2

Andy put her car in park and called Frank.

"McNally? Please tell me some good news," Frank said,

"The doctor cleared me," she said.

"Awesome, so I'll see you tomorrow then. Desk duty," he added.

"See you tomorrow, sir."

"Andy, one more thing. When you see Swarek, you tell him I'm expecting him back tomorrow, too."

"I haven't talked to Sam, sir," she said, trying to hide her smile in her voice.

"Right, like I said, McNally," he chuckled, "…I'll talk to you tomorrow."

Since she was anticipating a bombardment of questions the second she walked through the door, she had to get her story straight. _I went to the doctor then drove around for a while. _He'd buy it considering her excitement of finally becoming the owner of new car.

Andy hated that she was lying to him but she thought going to see a Psychologist was awkward enough, she didn't want to have to talk about it with somebody else; even if that somebody was Sam.

She opened the door and found Sam sitting on the couch, feet up, reading the paper, "…hey, how'd it go?" he asked.

Andy set her bag down, kicked off her shoes and sat down next to him, "…back to work tomorrow, for both of us!"

"Do you really want us to go back on the same day?" he asked.

"Best's orders, he told me to tell you that he expects you back tomorrow to when I see you," she answered.

He put his hand on her leg and turned to face her, "…you sure you're alright to go back?"

"Yeah," she said, hesitantly. Her phone rang again. _Luke. _Once again, she hit ignore.

"Who was it?"

"Luke," she said.

Sam resumed reading the paper, "…maybe you should cut the guy some slack, McNally."

Andy stared at him, attempting to process what he had just said. She had made a point not to talk about Luke, or even think about Luke, with Sam around and now he's telling her to _cut him some slack_?

He could tell what he said had annoyed her, something he completely understood; but he also knew what it was like to get the cold shoulder from Andy, and it was arctic.

"I'm just saying, maybe you should talk to him, you know, hear him out; no harm, no foul," Sam added.

"I really don't know that I can do that though," she added.

That was the truth. Luke was not there when she needed him. He proved to her that she just wasn't where she should have been on his priority list; actually, she wasn't even the general vicinity of where she should have been.

She wasn't needy, no, that wasn't it; but she could not make him a priority in her life, if she was simply an option in his. Dedication to your work is something Andy understood, but he was playing hopscotch on the line of obsession. Even though Luke was a lot things, ready for a serious relationship was just not one of those things.

* * *

After taking a shower, and contemplating the next few days, Andy thought it best to meet with Traci at the Penny, rather than trying to catch up before parade tomorrow.

"Come on, McNally! I'd like to get there _before _last call," Sam yelled up the stairs.

Andy grabbed her jacket off the bed and walked down the stairs, "…sorry. Let's go."

Sam looked up to see her standing on the last step; he was frozen, captivated by the way she made jeans and a t-shirt look.

"You alright?" she asked.

Sam snapped out of it. _Shake it off._ "Yeah, yeah…I'm fine. Let's get out of here," he answered.

An overwhelming feeling of anxiety flooded Andy as they pulled into the parking lot. _What if I run into my dad? What if I run into one of his old friends? What do I say if anyone asks about him?_ Her palms were sweating, her heart was racing.

"McNally, you look like you just saw a ghost," Sam said, as he placed the back of his hand on her face, "…what's wrong?"

"I-I-I can't go in there."

"Why?" he asked.

"I don't know what to say to anyone. They're going to want to know,they're _all_ going to want to know!" she stated, panicked.

"Andy, they're not, I promise," Sam reassured her.

_Just breathe. Change the subject if you don't like it. _The closer they got to the door, the faster her heart beat; but once they reached the door, she felt like it stopped.

"Andy!" Dov exclaimed, the second he spotted her in the doorway. His reaction prompted the entire bar to focus their attention on her. Sam knew that would make her uncomfortable, so he placed his hand on the small of her back and lead her towards the table that her friends were at before people had a chance to bombard her with questions he knew she had no desire to answer.

"Thank you," she whispered, as she took a seat next to Traci.

Sam nodded, then walked away to get drinks. Those closest to her knew that if she wanted to talk about it, she would; with the exception of ask how she had been doing, they continued with their normal conversations.

Traci, however, is relentless. Her mind flooded with questions as soon as she spotted Andy walk in with Sam, "…so, what's going on? Are you and Swarek, you know?" she asked, smiling from ear to ear.

"No," Andy said.

"You're lying!" Traci replied.

"No, Trace. I promise, I'm not. Sam's just…" she paused in an attempt to portray what really had been going on between her and Sam into words, "…he's just been there for me."

She wasn't lying. Sam had been there for her. He was there for her in the hospital from beginning to end and when she was released, he stepped up to make sure she'd be okay, but she would be lying if she said she didn't feel something for him.

"Are you staying with him?" Traci asked.

"No, well, kind of. I mean, I have stayed there, but it's not a consistent thing. It's complicated," she answered.

"Things are complicated? With Andy McNally? Hah. Never…" Traci added, sarcastically.

"Thanks, Trace."

Sam returned, drinks in hand, and sat down in between Oliver and Noelle, across from Andy. Traci's interrogation of Andy continued as Oliver's interrogation with Sam began, "…so, Sammy, are you and McNally…"

Sam shook his head, "…no."

"Are you sure?" Oliver asked.

Sam snapped his head in Oliver's direction and started to laugh, "…I think I'd remember that."

"I'm just asking," Oliver said, holding his hands up as if he were surrendering, "…how's she holding up?"

Sam looked across the table to Andy, who was trying to act as normal as she could.

"She's really not," Sam answered, knowing full well that Andy was on the verge of a breakdown.

"What about Tommy? Have either of you talked to him?"

"No, well not since it happened. He came to the hospital, and I made him leave," Sam said.

"You made her father leave?" Oliver asked, stunned.

"What was I supposed to do? Let the man who shot her go in and see her, still plastered?" Sam looked over to Oliver, "…I wanted Andy to press charges on him, but she refused."

"He's her father, Sammy," Oliver added, disapprovingly.

"I get that, I do, but he won't change! He is killing himself, and by doing that, he's slowly killing her. I can't just sit back and watch that happen."

In order to avoid making things awkward, Oliver kept his opinions to himself. He was not in any position to tell Sam what to do or what to think.

"That day, why'd you let her go upstairs by herself?" Sam asked.

"I asked her if she wanted me to come with her and she told me she'd just be a minute," Oliver answered, "…I never thought she'd be in any danger, Sammy, or I would've never let her go in alone."

Sam knew that Oliver was just respecting Andy's privacy, something he had never been able to do. Andy was embarrassed by her father's drinking, and only a handful of people were aware of how serious it had become; Sam was one of those people.

However, that day, Sam was not partnered with Andy and that was at his request.

**A/n: **Let me know what you think! Reviews are my motivation to continue and they are always appreciated!


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: **Thanks for the reviews. Glad you're liking the story.

CHAPTER 3

_*Flashback*_

_Sam reached the door to Frank Best's office and knocked on it lightly, peeking his head in, "…can I talk to you for a minute?" _

"_Sure, Sammy, what's up?" Frank asked._

_Sam took a seat in the chair across from him, "…it's about McNally."_

"_You have my attention," Frank said, looking up from the file he was reading._

"_I-I can't be partnered with her anymore," he said, as much as it pained him._

"_Okay, well, I'm going to need more than that," Frank explained, even though he was pretty sure he already knew. _

_Sam sat silently for a minute. There was so much he could say, so many reasons he shouldn't be partnered with Andy; but at the same time, he could come up with just as many that supported him being partnered with her. _

"_I need to keep things professional," Sam clarified; short, sweet and to the point. He knew Frank was fishing for the complicated answer, the one where Sam goes on to spill his guts about how he couldn't listen to Andy talk about her troubles in paradise with Callaghan any longer or how if Callaghan ignored her one more time to work on a case, he'd probably hit him because he was to dense to realize what he had. That is what Frank wanted to hear, but Sam refused to admit it aloud. He has accepted Andy's choice, he didn't agree with it, but he accepted it and he needed to move on. _

"_Alright, well, I can't guarantee anything long-term but for today, and the very near future, I'll partner you with Nash," Frank said, jotting something down on a piece of paper._

"_No, I can't do that either. Not right now anyway, Nash is McNally's best friend," Sam said._

"_Sammy, we have to be rational here," Frank added._

"_Just not right now," Sam pleaded._

"_Fine, you're with Diaz," Frank told him. _

"_Thanks," Sam said, sarcastically, knowing Frank only partnered him with Diaz because he was very 'by the book' and Sam wasn't. It was okay though because generally, people were intimidated by him and they just do as he says; except Andy, she never listened to him._

_*End Flashback*_

Sam walked to the guest bedroom to wake Andy up for work. He could not help wondering what would have, or would not have, happened that day if he hadn't asked for a new partner.

She hadn't done anything to deserve the hurt she had endured throughout her life, and he wanted nothing more than to protect her from anymore. He wanted to protect her from pain, disappointment, cruelty; he wanted to protect her from the world.

"Andy," he said, softly as he placed his hand on her arm.

She opened her eyes immediately and looked at Sam. Her eyes were dark and heavy, "…you didn't sleep, did you?" Sam asked.

"No," she said, conscious of the fact that there was absolutely no point in lying to Sam.

"Maybe you should call Frank and tell him you're not ready to go back."

Andy got out of bed and walked over to the bathroom, "…I can't do that."

He saw no point in arguing with her so he excused himself to get ready for work himself.

* * *

Andy pulled her new car into the parking lot, right next to Sam's truck. _How did he beat me here? _She killed the engine, grabbed her bag and walked towards the sliding double doors.

Her intention was to beeline to the locker room in hopes of staying off everyone's radar, but no such luck.

"Andy!" Luke said, scrambling in her direction.

She spun around in an attempt to spot Sam who was nowhere to be found, "…Andy," she head Luke say again.

She turned to his direction and half-grinned, "…hey, Luke."

"How are you doing? I've tried calling, did you lose your phone?" he asked.

_Did I lose my phone? Yeah…that's it. _"No, it's been acting up. I don't really get any calls, I can only make them," she answered. _Lies, lies, lies._

"Why haven't you called me?" he asked.

"I guess I really didn't have much to say."

"Andy, can't we just…" he started to say, but Andy cut him off.

"I can't do this today, here. We broke up, it's really just that simple," she interjected.

"No, Andy. We are going to talk about this, now," Luke demanded.

Andy stood there, stunned. It wasn't just for her benefit that she wanted to talk about this another day in a different place, "…Luke, we can't do this here."

"No, we can!"

"What the hell do you want from me, Luke?" she shouted.

"I want…" he started to yell, but realized that people were staring and quickly lowered his voice, "…I want an explanation."

"You want an explanation? Fine. I can't count on you, you are the most unreliable person I have ever met in my life. When I needed you, you told me you were working."

"You were hurt, that happens. It wasn't life threatening," he said, making an effort to defend himself.

Andy laughed and rolled her eyes, "…that's exactly my point. I don't care if I fell and had a bump on my head, I would still expect you to be there, or at least call me. You couldn't even do that, you didn't even know the details of what happened until you heard the news on a TV at a scene, how do you even begin to justify that?"

"I was working; I can't just up and leave at any given time, Andy. I'm a detective, not a patrolman," he said, with an obvious dig at Sam.

"Yeah, okay, you're God-given test taking talent makes it impossible for you to come to the hospital to see your girlfriend, who was shot. _By. Her. Father_. Right. Here's one for you, how is it Jerry was right there when he found out and he was on the same case as you?" she paused, giving him time for a response that didn't come, "…face it Luke, you just don't have time for anyone else in your life."

"So we're done because you don't like that I take my job seriously? Really, Andy?" he asked, cynically.

"No, Luke, we're done because _your inability to put __**anything**__ before your job _finally made me realize that I just don't love you."

With that, she turned and walked into the locker room. Emblematically, leaving Luke in her dust. As unsure as she was about what she wanted, she did know that Luke wasn't it.

After a few minutes sitting on the bench to collect herself, she opened her locker and started to get ready but then out of the corner of her eye she spotted the pictures that were taped to the door; pictures of her and her dad.

She ripped each one off as the tears ran down her face. In a rage, she started hitting the locker, but once physical violence proved to be useless she slid down to the floor, crying. She could not hold back the tears any longer.

Sam knocked on the door and when no one answered, he cracked it open to find Andy with her head buried in her knees, on the floor in a small pile of pictures of her and Tommy.

"It's alright, I'm here," he said as he put his arm around her, kissing the top of her head, "…you're gonna be alright."

He wished he believed that.

* * *

**A/N:** Let me know what you think! Reviews are my motivation, and they are always appreciated.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: **Sorry about the delay! My week has been crazy, but I've officially started Spring Break, so expect a few more updates soon (maybe even another one tonight, but no guarantees)**. **Thank you all so much for the reviews! Sorry this one is short, but it gets us where we need to be.

CHAPTER 4

It took Andy a while to regain composure, about a half hour of crying on Sam's shoulder and him 'throwing' the pictures of her and Tommy away. He actually just hid them in his locker because he knew that one day she would want them back.

"Now, are you sure you're okay?" he said, helping her up off the floor.

"I'll be fine," she said, furthering his belief that she wasn't ready to return to work.

"Yeah, because I believe that," he said as he walked out of the locker room.

* * *

The minutes seemed like hours, and the hours seemed like days. As hard as he tried, Sam couldn't fight the sinking feeling that he should go back to the barn, the feeling that he shouldn't have left her.

The day had proved to be nothing more than tedious paperwork, a few domestic calls and a couple routine traffic stops. _Did the entire city decide to put on their halos today? _Sam fidgeted in his seat; the apprehension was making him restless. He pulled off to the side of the road and told Diaz he would be right back, who responded with nothing more than a look of pure confusion.

Sam jogged off into the alley; he needed a minute to collect his thoughts, a minute to relax without the constant inquisition of Chris. Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted a bottle of whiskey, empty and the only thing that flashed into his mind was Tommy McNally.

He walked over and picked up the bottle; only to slam it to the ground, shattering it. He couldn't understand around how the contents of that bottle could ever be more important to a man than his daughter, than Andy; how the contents of that bottle could completely control a man's life.

He looked up at the sound of Chris calling for him, "…sir, your phone was ringing."

Sam reached down in his pocket. _Damn, I did leave it in the car. _

"I didn't answer it, but then mine rang, it was Traci. Tommy's at the station," Chris said, prompting Sam to rush back to the car.

Within minutes, they were back at the barn. Sam ran in to find Andy sitting in the chair, crying as her father was being violently escorted out.

"Swarek, you're a man of reason," Tommy said, slurring his words, as he broke free from the officers who were removing him, "…tell my daughter that she needs to talk to me."

Sam ignored him as he walked toward Andy, "…are you alright?" he asked.

She nodded, tears still running down her face; he could see Tommy getting closer and he knew that would only upset Andy more so he stood up, blocking Tommy's path to Andy.

"Swarek, move. I need to talk to my daughter," he said loudly.

"No, Tommy, you need to leave," Sam replied.

"Sammy, get out of my way," Tommy said, as he started to push passed Sam.

"Don't touch me, Tommy," Sam stated, pushing him farther away from Andy.

"I have a right to talk to my daughter."

"Not if she doesn't want to talk to you," Sam said, looking him right in the eye.

Tommy looked to Andy, who simply looked away.

"You don't even deserve to call her your daughter," Sam said to Tommy, clearly cutting him deep.

Reluctantly, Tommy turned and walked toward the door, glancing back at Sam one more time before exiting.

* * *

Andy walked up the stairs and down the hallway to the office of Dr. Diane Graham, an appointment she had not been looking forward to; in fact, she had been attempting to come up with excuses to cancel it.

"So, Andy, last time we talked, well last time I talked, and you mostly listened," Diane said. This was Andy's third time to sit on this couch, in this office, "…you told me that your father had shown up at the police station, have you heard anything else from him?"

Andy shook her head, determined to be as silent this time as she was the last.

"I heard on you on the phone when you left last time with someone, someone named Sam," she said, watching Andy's reaction closely, "…who's Sam?"

"Co-worker, my partner actually," she answered, throwing her vow of silence into the wind.

"That's it? He's just a co-worker?" Diane asked.

Andy hesitated, she wasn't sure what he was exactly, "…friend, he's a friend too."

"Does Sam know about your father?"

"Yeah, he does. Sam's been there to…help me through it," Andy answered, aversely.

"Did Sam know about your father before the shooting?" she asked.

"Yes."

"So you trust him?"

"I guess," Andy said.

"Tell me about him."

_What does she want to know? Maybe I will just give her his number and she can call him. Ha. Not that she'll get much out of him, Sam doesn't talk about Sam. _

"He's dedicated, stubborn, loyal; I feel like I'm describing a dog," she said, actually cracking a smile, "…but that's just his exterior. He's really sweet, caring and a bit over protective."

"You speak highly of him," Diane said, approvingly.

"Yeah, well, like I said, he's my partner." _And I kind of love him, I just wish I could tell him that. _

_

* * *

_

**A/N: **Let me know what you think! Reviews are loved and appreciated!


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: **Thanks for the reviews and being patient! This chapter was kind of hard for me to write, nothing sounded right in words; like I wasn't doing it justice because, as I said in the beginning, this is a very personal story for me. Hope you like it!

CHAPTER 5

After _almost_ spilling her guts about Sam, Andy clammed up again; the conversation on her part consisted of 'uh-huh's' and nodding which did nothing but make the hour seem unending. Once hit finally ended she stood to walk out but Diane stopped her, "…Andy, could you do me a favor?" she asked.

"Sure," Andy said, thinking she would ask her to start writing in a journal or something that may be _therapeutic._

"Your appointment Friday, bring Sam with you," and that's all she said just before she closed the door. She didn't give Andy time to respond because she knew she'd argue it.

_Just because I trust him doesn't mean I trusted him with this information. _As much as she despised the idea, she thought it might be a good idea. It would certainly make things less awkward for her because maybe, just maybe, she wouldn't be the center of attention for the entire hour. _I'm sure she wouldn't like it if somebody pried her for information, non-stop, mercilessly for an hour. _If she had to describe therapy to someone, she'd compare it to being questioned by the police. Uninterested in your excuses, only worried about the facts.

_Get to the point. _Andy repeats that phrase in her heard when she's questioning suspects or witnesses. It becomes repetitive in therapy to; except in therapy, she's being asked the questions.

* * *

Andy sat Sam down, "…I have something really important to ask you."

"Go for it," Sam said, calmly.

"Well first I have something to tell you," she added, knowing Sam would be confused if she asked him to go to a therapy session that he wasn't aware she attended in the first place.

"Spill, McNally."

"I've been seeing a Psychologist," she said.

"I figured that," he said, "….it's standard protocol in the event of something tragic. Usually it's optional, because mandated therapy won't really do you a great deal of good, especially if you resist."

"You seem to know a lot about it," she asked, inquisitively.

"Yeah, I've dealt with the department psychologist a few times, well the old one. She moved to Oregon though. Are you just being evaluated?"

"Maybe? I don't know, I'm not sure. The only explanation I got was that the department wanted to be sure I wasn't a liability, or emotionally unstable, whatever that means."

"Did you just start seeing her?"

"Last week, today was my third appointment."

Sam looked over at Andy, puzzled, "…third appointment?"

"Yeah, what?"

"Evals are usually one session, she'll either clear you or say you need more intensive treatment," he said, with certainty, as if he were speaking from experience.

"Great, I'm insane, I've officially lost my damn mind!" Andy exclaimed, flailing her arms in the air.

She took off into the kitchen, mumbling but all Sam could make out sounded like _they're coming to take me away, ha-ha. _

"McNally, really?"

She walked back into the living room, eating a dreamsicle, "…you know, I never understood that song until now."

"You still don't understand it, Andy. Come here, sit down," Sam said, tapping his hand on the cushion of the couch.

Andy sat down, curling her legs underneath her.

"You're not insane, I promise; a little crazy at times, yes, but who doesn't have moments like that?"

Andy nodded in agreement, though she wasn't sure she completely agreed.

"That being said," Sam added, "…I know you and I know you're probably resisting this woman with everything you have, maybe you should give her a shot."

"I am, I asked you to come with me, didn't I?" she snapped, not even convincing herself.

"You're grumpy," he said, standing up and walking upstairs.

"Where are you going?" she asked.

Sam stopped, turned around and peeked his head down the stairs, "…I'm going to go change my shirt and then I'm going to the Penny."

"What, I'm not invited?"

"Sure, you are, but grumpy Andy isn't," he shouted from the top of the stairs.

She got up, grabbed her stuff and walked out, only to receive a call from Sam minutes later.

"Where'd you go?" Sam asked, in place of _hello._

"I'm going home."

"So you're not going to the Penny?"

"No."

"Grumpy Andy needs a nap," he said, under his breath, kind of hoping Andy wouldn't hear it.

"Yeah, I'm going to act like I didn't hear that," she replied.

"You do that, I'm going to the Penny. Call me when you're nice again," Sam said, then hung up the phone.

_Jerk. _She knew she was being difficult, but Sam was never one to point it out; she had assumed that was because he himself was difficult most of the time.

Just as she was about to get out of the car and walk up to her apartment, her phone rang. _Traci. _

"Hello?" Andy snapped.

"Hey, I'm headed up to the Penny with Jerry. You want to meet us?" she asked.

"No, I'm not going to the Penny tonight. Jeez," she said, breathing heavily from the stairs.

"Who peed in your cheerios?" Traci responded.

"Why does everyone seem to think I'm being such a bitch today? Even if I am, why am I catching hell? Gail's a bitch everyday and nobody hassles her about it!"

"Andy, is it that time of the month or something?" Traci asked.

"No, it's not. Trace, I'll just call you tomorrow," Andy said, hanging up the phone.

_Maybe it is that time. _Andy set her bag down on the table and looked at her calendar. _Bingo. _

Suddenly she didn't feel so bad for snapping at everyone or for crying in Dr. Graham's office because, she actually had something to blame it on. _PMS. _A great cover for an emotional woman on the brink.

* * *

She found herself curled up in her bed watching Titanic; one more thing she could blame on the PMS, except this time it was true. It was a sad movie all on its own, but Andy had other issues with it. Since the first time she watched the movie, she wanted a love like Jack and Rose had. The story of two people who, no matter how opposite, were just meant for each other. _I could do without the whole guy dying thing, though._

Andy could quote the entire movie, as cheesy as that may seem; and she'll be singing _My Heart Will Go On _for days now at the expense of those around her but it's all worth it because it reminded her of what it is to dream, to want something that seems so out of reach. Except now, it didn't seem so out of reach; actually, it was within grasp, she just didn't have the guts to grab it.

* * *

When the movie ended, she wiped the tears from her eyes. She wanted to forget how screwed up her life had gotten, she didn't want to feel _anything_; Andy grabbed the bottle of whiskey from her counter and began to drink.

She drank until there was none left, until she couldn't see straight; that's when she grabbed her keys and walked out the door.

After stumbling all the way down the stairs she reached the door, which she had forgotten how to open. She stood and stared, mystified, until someone came in, allowing her to slide out without having to do any kind of actual thinking.

Andy staggered down the sidewalk, holding on to buildings for support until someone came up from behind, "…don't touch me. I'm a cop and I have a gun," she slurred, lightly smacking them.

"No, you don't. Your gun is at the station," Sam said.

"Sam, what are you-what are you doing here?" she attempted to say.

"I came to check on you. Good thing, let's go," he began to lead her back towards her building.

"No, I have to go talk to my dad," she said, loosening his grip on her and turning around, almost face planting into the cement.

"McNally, what the hell are you doing? How much have you had to drink?" he asked, agitated.

"Obviously more than you," she said.

"Come on, you need to get some rest," he started to push her back in the other direction, until she started to fight him.

"No, Sam. I am a grown woman, I can do as I please," she argued.

He responded by picking her up and carrying her, "…Sam Swarek, put me down now!"

"I'm not going to let you do anything you'll regret, or that could get you killed," he said, referring to her inability to walk on her own.

"I need to talk to my dad," she said.

"And say what, Andy?"

"Say-say-say that he-he-let me down, that he was the only person I had and he left me too," the tears began to fall and she buried her head into Sam's shoulder, and whispered, "…that he ruined me."

* * *

**A/N: **Let me know what you think! Reviews are loved and appreciated! The song I was referring to was _They're Coming To Take Me Away _by Lard (I think?). And I know, Titanic, cliché; but I just watched it and it reminded me of this in a weird way.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: **Thanks for the reviews! This is a little short, but in my opinion, a bit intense. Hope you like it!

CHAPTER 6

The light streamed in, waking Andy up and initiating the killer headache she would endure all day.

"Good morning, Sunshine," Sam said, all to cheerfully as he opened the curtains a little bit more, making her cringe just the slightest bit more, "…how are you feeling?" he flopped down on the bed.

"Like I got hit by a Mack truck," she said, sitting up slowly.

"Whiskey will do that to you, especially when you mix it with tequila," he responded, disapprovingly.

"If I remember correctly, I didn't drink the tequila until you were here," she said, giving him the evil eye.

"I'm surprised you can remember anything."

"Why didn't you stop me?'' she asked, shielding her eyes from the sunlight.

"Have you ever witnessed drunk you? _You are violent. _You bit me twice and threw heels at me, eventually I gave up. In my opinion, you deserve that hangover," he chuckled, making light of a potentially bad situation.

"Thanks," she added, sarcastically.

"My pleasure," he hopped up and walked toward the kitchen.

Andy wanted nothing more than to just go to sleep, but even that seemed like an impossibility. When the room started spinning, she darted to bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

Several minutes later, Andy opened the bathroom door to find Sam sitting on bed with a glass of water, Alka Seltzer and V-8, "…sure-fire hangover cure, I assure you."

"Thank you," she said; grabbing the water and Alka Seltzer, "…I thought you were enjoying this?"

"Yeah, well, as entertaining as it is, I don't really want to watch you suffer," he answered.

He turned on the TV and sat with her as she struggled to get the V-8 down. He felt for her, too. _That stuff is nasty._

She kept looking over at him, as if she had something to say and the second his glance would shift in her direction she'd quickly look the other way, "…spit it out, McNally."

"I'm sorry," she said, without hesitation. It was almost as if she were waiting for an invitation.

"Sorry for what?" he asked.

"For…last night," she said, pulling her knees to her chest, "…I shouldn't have dumped all that on you. It's not your burden to bear, I wasn't going to go to my dad's anyway," she said.

"He didn't ruin you, Andy."

"I don't want to talk about it," she said, getting up from the bed and walking into the kitchen.

"Well, I think you need to talk about it," Sam added, following her.

"And what do you know, huh? You are not living this, I have been in hell for the past couple months, Sam. I don't want to talk, I want to deal with it on my own!" she shouted.

"That's just it; you are NOT dealing with it. You're trying to act like it didn't happen, like nothing has changed and it's getting you nowhere!"

"Acting like it didn't happen? I know it happened Sam, I am completely aware of the fact that I was shot and that the man who pulled the trigger was my father. Every single day I relive it, every single day I am reminded that I am alone in this world, that every person I've ever trusted or counted on has let me down. I'm dealing with it Sam and I'm sorry if it's not in a way you approve of, but I am dealing with it," she said, tears flowing.

"No, you're not," he added, matter-of-factly.

"Get out," she walked to the door and opened it, "…leave."

Sam grabbed his jacket and stormed out.

She slammed the door behind him and slid down to the floor, crying. He was right, and she knew it, she knew she wasn't dealing with it but in all honesty, she didn't know how.

* * *

Sam couldn't help shedding a few tears once he got into the truck. He felt like she was watching her self-destruct and no matter how hard he tried, he just could not help her; his hands were tied.

Instead of going home, he decided to make a pit stop at Tommy McNally's.

He walked up the stairs and knocked on the door, "…oh, it's you," Tommy said when he opened the door. He turned to walk back to the couch, leaving the door open behind him.

Sam walked in, shutting the door behind him. He quickly noticed a few empty whiskey bottles on the counter, and one that was half-full on the floor by the couch, "…I guess, uh, old habit's die hard," Sam said.

"Swarek, if you came here to judge me, feel free to leave," Tommy replied. It was obvious to Tommy that Sam had no intentions of leaving, "…how's Andy? Or is that topic off limits?"

"Not off limits. She's a mess," Sam said.

"That makes me feel a whole hell of a lot better," he responded.

"Truth hurts."

"You really get off on making me feel like shit, don't you?" Tommy asked.

"It's really not about you, Tommy."

"Why don't you just tell me why you're here so we can end this little rendezvous?" Tommy said, angered by Sam's comments.

"I don't really even know why I'm here, I guess part of me wanted to come here and see that you were trying to help yourself but clearly, I was wrong," Sam said, walking toward the door to leave.

"I don't need help, I'm perfectly fine. I'm happy with my life and if Andy has chosen to not be a part of it, so be it. She is a grown woman and she can make her own decisions. I apologized and in my book, that makes me golden," Tommy said, undoubtedly believing every word he just spoke.

"What's it going to take for you to really hit rock bottom, for you to realize that you've lost everything, that you've got nothing left to live for? You are hurting your daughter, how can you live with yourself this way?" Sam said, "…she looked up to you, she never wanted to do anything except make you proud and all you ever did was disappoint her. I would be so ashamed at myself if I were in your shoes right now."

"Who are you to come in here and talk to me like that? I've been with Andy from the day she was born; you've known her for just over a year. You don't know anything about me and my family, Swarek. Now, I suggest you leave before things here start to get ugly," Tommy explained.

"They already are," he said, walking out of Tommy's apartment.

* * *

Andy walked into the waiting area for Dr. Graham's office, checked in and sat down. It took a few minutes, but eventually her name was called. She walked in to find someone else sitting on the couch in Diane's office, "…Sam?"

**A/N:** Let me know what you think! Reviews are always loved & appreciated!


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N:** Thanks for the reviews! I feel like this chapter lags (?). It's kind of a filler chapter, I guess. I don't know. Anyway, here it is! Enjoy! Oh, BTW: I said on Twitter and I'll say it here, I started a Chris/Gail fic, I will post it soon, so if you're interested keep an eye out.

CHAPTER 7

"What are you doing here?' she asked.

"You asked me to come," he replied.

She knew it would be pointless to argue it with him, so she just sat down as far away from Sam as she found humanly possible. Actually, if she got any farther away, she would probably be on the floor, "…well, I could cut the tension with a knife. Andy, do you want to tell me what happened?" Diane asked.

Andy replied by simply giving her a look, implying that she did not intend to explain anything to her.

"Okay then, Sam, how about you?" she said, knowing he would be far more cooperative then Andy.

"I found her walking down the road drunk, toward her father's house and when I stopped her she said she had to talk to him. Long story short, I wound up carrying her back to her apartment and she told me that he was the only person she had left, that he ruined her. It was like she had finally let her guard down," he paused and looked over to her; she continued ignoring him, so he continued, "…then the next morning, when I mentioned it, she closed up again. Airtight. She said she didn't want to talk about it and I told her she needed to because she wasn't dealing with it."

"And then what happened?" Diane inquired.

"We argued and she kicked me out," Sam said.

"You tried to tell me that I wasn't dealing with it!" Andy chimed in.

"You aren't!" Sam replied.

"How are you going to tell me?"

"I'm not having this conversation again, McNally. It gets us nowhere."

He was right, the conversation was like one big vicious circle and it seemed like no matter how many times the repeated it, the outcome would always be the same. They needed a new approach, a new point of view.

"Andy, you trusted Sam with the information about your father's alcohol abuse, why are you so closed off now?"

"Most people _know_ about my dad, I mean, they all suspect. Sam is my partner, though. He went with me to check on him a few times, he helped me clear him in a murder investigation. Sam has always been there," Andy said.

"Exactly my point! So, what makes you think now is any different?" Sam asked.

"Andy, you told me that Sam has been helping you through this by just being there for you. Why is it so hard for you to open up to him?" Diane said, before Andy had a chance to respond to Sam's question.

Andy sat there, staring blankly; imperviously.

"Andy?" Diane said, fishing for answer.

She looked around the room in an attempt to change the subject, "…what about hypnotization? Would that be beneficial in my case?" Andy asked.

"McNally, answer the damn question!" Sam shouted, awaiting her response.

Andy turned her head to look at him, her eyes were tearing up. She turned towards Diane, and let them fall, "…everyone I've ever let in, trusted or loved, leaves. I've lost everyone I have ever truly cared about, and I'm not ready to lose you," she turned towards Sam once more; "…I can't lose you."

She got up and walked out, leaving Diane and Sam speechless.

* * *

Sam knew exactly where she was headed, so he quickly followed but not before promising that he and Andy would be back for her next appointment. He knew that her breakdown was not a breakthrough in her working through her issues with her dad, but it was certainly a breakthrough in her inability to let Sam into her life; which was, hopefully, a stepping-stone in the journey ahead. She needed to talk about it with someone, but someone she knew and _trusted; _not a stranger in an office.

He pulled up to the lighthouse where he found Andy's little blue car. Sam started to circle the lighthouse when he spotted her, sitting on a rock, staring out at the water with her knees pulled to her chest and tears falling from her eyes.

He sat down behind her, facing the lighthouse, "…I wouldn't leave you."

She sniffled and wiped her eyes.

"You wouldn't lose me, actually, I'd like to see you try and get rid of me," he added in an attempt to cheer her up a bit. Sam had watched her cry far too many times lately.

She giggled, so he knew he had succeeded, "…how did you know where to find me? Did you follow me?"

"I just knew. Gut feeling, you know," he said. Actually, he knew this is where her father went to blow off steam and he knew that Andy, as much as she liked to deny it, was a lot like her father; but for both Andy and his benefit, he hoped the similarities weren't numerous.

"I really don't like talking to Diane," Andy added, with a look of disgust plastered on her face.

"Why?"

"I don't know her. I don't like to talk about my problems with the people I have known for years, why would I want to talk about them with some woman I hardly know? Some woman who thrives on listening to people's problems?" Andy said, "…she just sit's there and nods, asking me how I feel about things, well if I knew how I felt, would I be sitting here?"

"You are very anti-therapist," he said, with a grin on his face. His dimples made her smile.

"You seem to be very pro-therapist," she added, tauntingly.

"I told you, I've had to deal with my fair share."

"But you never told me why," Andy said, in attempt to find out.

"That's a story for another day, but I will say this: I am not pro-therapist but they can actually help," he said.

"So you're saying I should give her a chance?"

"I've been saying you should give her a chance, I think she could help."

"I can't talk to her, Sam," Andy added.

"Who can you talk to?" Sam asked.

Andy looked back out at the water, "…you."

"Well, how about I come with you?"

Andy rolled her eyes, "…do I really have to go see her?"

"Well, no, but you'll probably never get put on the streets again," Sam said, knowing that would get her attention. When she rolled her eyes again, he changed his reasoning, "…then do it for me."

Once again, she turned toward the water, this time so he couldn't see her smile from ear to ear, and nodded her head.

"Come back to the house with me, we'll get some food and watch a movie…"

"What movie?" Andy asked.

"Your pick."

"Let's go!" Andy said, quickly standing up from the rock.

* * *

Sam and Andy sat down in the restaurant; it was quiet and somewhat dark. _Romantic_ came to mind, "…you're quiet tonight," Sam said.

"Just thinking," Andy replied.

"Yeah? About what?" Sam asked, taking another bite of his steak.

"Why you've never asked me out," Andy quickly replied.

Sam almost choked on his food and immediately took a drink, "…well, that came out of nowhere."

"You asked, I answered," Andy replied, "…so, why haven't you?"

* * *

**A/N:** I don't know why, but I see Andy in a blue car, like a blue/teal new Camaro or Malibu ;) Let me know what you think! Reviews are loved and appreciated, always!


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: **Thanks so much for the reviews! Sorry it's taken me a while to update, I've had a hectic week! This chapter was hard to write, it took a lot out of me but I'm pretty happy with the finished project. Enjoy. Also, I own nothing Rookie Blue.

CHAPTER 8

Andy stormed into the house and slammed the door, followed closely behind by Sam, "…McNally, stop it!"

"Sam, no, seriously. You're such a hypocrite!"

Sam scoffed, "…how do you figure?"

"You are forever on me about opening up to you, trusting you, telling me that you'll always be here for me but that's a two way street, you know. I asked you a simple question and you completely dismissed it. The one time I try to figure out what it is we're doing here, you just acted like you didn't even hear me," Andy said, slamming things around the bathroom. As angry as she was, she still intended on staying at Sam's because she knew she wouldn't be able to do anything stupid with him there.

"You gotta give me more than a ten second window to respond, Andy! You caught me off guard; there were a thousand ways I imagined that conversation coming about, and that was just not one of them," Sam said.

"It wasn't a question that required a thought-out response," she said, brushing past him into the bedroom.

"Andy, wait," Sam said.

"I don't have anything else to say."

Sam shook his head and walked away, slamming the bedroom door behind him. He got halfway down the hallway before he turned back around, swinging the door open, "…I've never asked you out because I didn't want to make things any more awkward between us then they already were. You were with Luke, and despite what people may think, I'm just not that guy, McNally."

"I haven't been with Luke for a while now," Andy added.

"You haven't been yourself for a while now either," Sam replied, "…right now, my priority isn't my relationship status with you. That's unimportant. It's getting you back to a good place, restoring some normalcy in your life. You are my priority, not our relationship."

Andy walked past him and sat down on the bed, processing everything she just heard, "…you want to know something?" she asked, looking up to him. Sam nodded.

"I don't know what I'm doing, or what I'm going to do. You're right, I'm not dealing with this; dealing with it meant it happened and I would love to forget about it. Actually, I'd like to forget Andy McNally ever existed. Maybe I could run away, change my name and start a whole new life?" Andy said, prompting Sam to stare at her, eyebrows raised, "…too much?" she asked.

Sam only nodded, "…thought so. You know, this whole thing has completely messed everything up. It's like my entire life derailed."

"Most people hit speed bumps and roadblocks, you seem to land in the sinkholes, but you're strong. If anybody can get through this, it's you," Sam said, placing his arm around her.

"I don't think I know how to deal with it."

"We'll talk about it more tomorrow, tonight just get some sleep," Sam said, kissing her forehead, "…goodnight."

He shut off the light and walked back downstairs, flipping on the TV so mask the sound of his voice. He dialed a familiar number; the number of the only person he thought would be able to help him, Sarah's number.

* * *

He must have fallen asleep because at 3:12am he was woken up on the couch by his cell phone ringing, it was someone at the station.

"Swarek," he said, his voice deeper because he just woke up.

"Sir, its Dov. Look, I don't know who to call about this, but one of the other officer's arrested Tommy McNally and brought him in. I didn't think Andy was talking to him but if I don't release him to someone he'll have to spend the night in the drunk tank."

"Like that'll do him any good, I'll be there in fifteen, Epstein."

Sam hung up the phone and grabbed his keys; there was something about driving in the early hours of the morning that he found comforting. He didn't know if it was the silence, or the calm; either way, he enjoyed it.

He could hear Tommy the second he walked through the door. _I should let him rot in jail over-night. _As good as that idea seemed, he couldn't do that to Andy. Despite what he had done, he was still her father and they still shared a last name, and by association, a reputation that needed to be upheld.

"You called Swarek? You really are a rookie. I'm not going anywhere with him," Tommy said, stubbornly at the sight of Sam.

"It's me or the cell, Tommy. Take your pick, frankly I won't be heartbroken if you choose the cell," Sam added, cynical in his tone.

"Call someone else, rook," Tommy demanded.

"You don't have anybody else," Dov replied.

"Call my…" Tommy started, only to be interrupted by Sam.

"Daughter? Your daughter that you shot? I'm sure she'll jump at the chance to pick her father up from jail because he got shit-faced and tried to drive, yeah, she'll be absolutely thrilled," Sam said, sarcastically.

Dov grinned as he pretended to type something into the computer.

"Look, Tommy, I don't have all night," Sam said.

Reluctantly, Tommy stood up and walked out with Sam.

* * *

Tommy's eyes were glued on the gun that sat on the dash of Sam's truck, something Sam had noticed but decided to ignore. He was thoroughly entertained by the look of horror on Tommy's face; it was as if he thought Sam had some sadistic plan.

"My apartment isn't this way," Tommy said.

"I know," Sam said, staring at the road.

"Where are you taking me?" Tommy started to panic.

"You'll see," Sam replied.

An hour later, Sam pulled into a dark drive, parked and killed the engine.

"A cemetery?" Tommy asked frantically.

Sam remained silent as he opened the truck door and got out. Tommy watched as Sam walked directly toward a headstone, clearly a walk he had made several times before. Once he realized Sam did not intend to kill him, he got out of the truck and stood next to Sam, "…Michael Swarek?" Tommy said, reading the headstone.

"My dad," Sam answered.

Tommy couldn't just stand there quietly, "…he was young."

"38," Sam said, the pain in his voice clear.

"What happened, if you don't mind me asking?" Tommy said.

"He drank himself to death. He drank every day of his life," Sam said, looking at Tommy, "…eventually alcohol just wasn't enough anymore. He started doing cocaine. A few months later, he put the gun to his head, and pulled the trigger," Sam stood up and looked at the sky.

"He left my mother, my sister and I there to try to make sense of it all, to take the blame. I never forgave him," Sam added as he turned to walk toward the truck, "…let's go, I need to get back home before Andy wakes up."

The ride home was silent. It was clear that Sam had given up, he knew he couldn't change Tommy because that was something he'd have to do for himself, so he dropped him off and went home to Andy, who was awake.

"Where were you?" Andy asked.

"Dov called; there was a problem with some of my paperwork from a couple weeks ago. I couldn't sleep so I went in to fix it," he hated to lie to her, but he didn't want her to get all worked up again.

"You look exhausted," she told him.

"Yeah, thanks," he said, with a smile.

"Come here," Andy said, opening the blanket.

Sam sat down next to her and curled up under the blanket, everything he had revisited tonight went away because he was next to her.

* * *

Tommy sat in his apartment, staring the brand new bottle of whiskey. _He left my mother, my sister and I there to try to make sense of it all, to take the blame. I never forgave him. _Sam's words haunted him.

He could not live with this any longer.

* * *

**A/N:** As always, let me know what you think! Reviews make my day and are always appreciated!


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: **Thank you for the reviews. I'm not sure how many more chapters are left, I'm thinking a few more, 2-4 probably, and an epilogue.

CHAPTER 9

Sam woke up on the couch with Andy, who was already wide-awake.

"Good morning, sleepyhead," Andy said, in an obviously good mood; which was a refreshing change of pace.

"What time is it?" Sam asked, groggily.

"Almost 11am," Andy answered, "…are you hungry?"

"Kind of," Sam said.

"I'll make breakfast," Andy replied as she stood up from the couch and walked into the kitchen.

He took out his phone. _Two missed calls. Sarah._

Sam got up and walked to the bathroom so he could call her back.

"Sammy?" Sarah said, answering on the first ring.

"Hey," Sam said, not sure exactly how to start the conversation.

"Did you take him to…." Sarah started to ask, but trailed off. It was harder to say aloud.

"Yeah," Sam answered.

"And…" Sarah pushed.

"I don't really know, Sarah. I just don't know what to think, and I don't know what to tell Andy," Sam said.

"Just tell her you took her to dad's grave, that you tried to knock some sense into him," she suggested.

"She doesn't know anything about dad though," Sam said quietly, ashamed that he had not told Andy about it.

"Sammy…" Sarah breathed, sympathetically. Their father's death had taken a lot out of Sam, and to this day it's a touchy subject for him to talk about, even with Sarah, "…where does she think you were?"

"I told her I went in to fix some paperwork," hearing it again only made him feel worse for lying to her.

"You need to tell her, I know it's hard for you but things aren't going to end well if she finds out from someone else," Sarah told him.

"I know," Sam admitted.

"Go talk to her, make it right. If you need anything, call me."

"I will."

Sam hung up the phone, he hated that Sarah was always right but he could always count on her to keep him straight. He washed his hands to keep up the whole _bathroom_ façade and then made his way into the kitchen.

"Can we talk for a minute?" Sam asked, startling Andy.

"Sure, just let me get a lid for this," Andy opened the cupboard and set the lid on the pan. He loved that she knew her way around his kitchen, "…what's going on?" Andy asked as she sat down at the table.

"Have I ever said anything to you about my dad?" Sam asked, knowing he hadn't but he couldn't think of another way to lead into the subject.

"No, not that I can remember," Andy replied.

"He was an alcoholic, for a good portion of his life, actually. At some point though, the alcohol wasn't strong enough anymore and he tried cocaine," Sam hesitated, "…he was hooked instantly, and he kept it a secret. I remember coming home from school one day, I was in 9th grade, and Sarah was in 11th. I walked that day because she had to stay for practice," Sam paused. He had only spoke about this next part with two people, "…I had heard a loud bang when I was walking down the street, I figured it was a firework or something. It was the nicest day we'd had in a long time, so it wasn't rare for some kids to be playing around with firecrackers. My mom was still at work, but my dad's truck was in the driveway, so I walked in the door and started talking loudly about my day, assuming my dad would come around the corner to talk with me about it, but he didn't. I looked around the house and couldn't find him; finally, I went to the back door to let the dog out because he had been barking since I walked in the door and I saw my dad's feet on the ground and his gun next to his body."

Andy's eyes were welling up with tears, "…I had…I had no idea."

"Last night, I didn't go in to fix paperwork, I went in to pick up your dad," he watched as Andy's expression changed, "…Dov called me and said another officer brought him in on DUI charges. He said if I didn't come in and get him, he would sit in the drunk tank all night, so I picked him up and took him to the cemetery, to my dad's grave. I thought it might knock some sense into him."

"And did it?" Andy snapped.

"I took him home and haven't heard anything from him since."

"He probably went home and drank until he passed out," Andy said, shaking her head, "…wait, and is that why you said you had to deal with the department psychologist before?"

"Yeah, my partner and I, we found a guy who had committed suicide. I was still new and it had kind of taken me back," Sam answered, internally refusing to talk about the rest of the story.

* * *

People knew when Sam shut off his cell phone he was not to be bothered unless it was an emergency, and only the people who mattered had the phone number to his house so when he heard it ringing he jumped out of bed like a bat out of hell, but still tried his hardest not to wake Andy.

It had been well over a week since Sam had taken Tommy to the cemetery, and no one had seen or heard from him since. That, in and of itself, had Sam on edge.

"Hello?" Sam said quietly.

"Can I please speak with Sam Swarek?" the woman on the other end asked.

"Speaking," Sam responded.

"My name is Dana; I'm a nurse at St. Mike's. We have a Thomas McNally here, he was brought in my EMS twenty minutes ago, they just took him up to surgery but he asked me to call you," she said.

"Um…I'll uh, be right there," Sam said, scratching his head. _Why would Tommy ask them to call me?_

Sam left a note for Andy to call him if she woke up, but he was really hoping she wouldn't.

In his many years on the force, Sam had learned that his badge could get him a lot of things; including access to information in hospitals that should never be released to him.

"Can I help you sir?" a nurse asked, when she noticed Sam walking around aimlessly.

Nonchalantly, he flashed his bag, "…what can you tell me about Tom- or, I mean, Thomas McNally?"

"Just one second," she disappeared behind a desk, and re-emerged with a folder, "…he was in critical, but stable condition when they brought him in, and the immediately took him up to surgery, but that's really all we have at this time. You can go ahead and take a seat in the waiting room and someone will be out to update you shortly," she said, as she had said a thousand times before.

Sam was hardly a patient man and he was completely aware of the fact that surgery has the potential to take an unbelievably long time. The only option he thought was at all viable? Sleep.

"Sam Swarek?"

Sam heard his name and his eyes flew open. He looked down at his watch, it was 5am, he'd been there for three hours, "…over here."

The doctor walked in his direction as he sat up, "…I'm Dr. Clarke, and Thomas is out of surgery."

"Tommy, he goes by Tommy," Sam corrected him.

"I'm sorry, Tommy is out of surgery. He's awake and talking, but the medication will probably knock him out cold soon," Dr. Clarke explained.

"Do you want to tell me what all happened?" Sam asked.

"He was hit by a truck. From what I gathered from one of the other officers, he pissed somebody off and they waited for him to leave, then they ran him down. There was some internal bleeding, but we were able to repair it. He's got a few fractured ribs, which will prove to be very painful and they completely shattered the bone in his right leg, but he should make a full recovery, only time will tell," he clarified.

"What was his blood alcohol content?" Sam asked, unsure if he really wanted to know.

"BAC?" he flipped through the papers in his hand, "…0.32, that's incredibly high. This man, he averted death twice tonight, he's very lucky."

"Of course he is," Sam said under his breath, "…thank you. Can I go see him?"

"Absolutely, he's in room 2034."

Sam wasn't too fond of hospitals, and he dealt with them all too often. He walked into Tommy's room to find a blonde standing over him, "…Monica?"

"Why doesn't it shock me to see you here?" she said, as she sat Tommy up, "…no uniform?"

"I'm not on duty," he answered.

"Well, then you shouldn't be in here," Monica said.

"He's my future son-in-law," Tommy grumbled, knowing that would get Monica to back off.

"Son-in-law, really?" Monica asked.

Sam simply raised his eyebrows and smiled.

"McNally, huh? I knew there was something going on with your rookie," Monica said, as she exited the room.

Sam pulled the chair up to Tommy's bed and shook his head, "…are you ever going to learn?"

"Swarek, I'm ready. I need your help."

* * *

**A/N:** As always, let me know what you think! You're feedback means a lot!


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: **Okay, thank you all for the reviews! They really are appreciated! This chapter is somewhat of a filler/set-up, because the next one is going to be big (and I don't mean in length, necessarily). I slacked on the editing a bit because I'm really excited to get the next chapter done, so sorry about that. I'm hoping to update again within the next couple days. Saturday is my goal!

Disclaimer: I own nothing Rookie Blue.

CHAPTER 10

"Why should I help you, when you're clearly not willing to help yourself? Do you realize that no matter what I do, unless you want this and I mean really want this, it'll never work?" Sam said, sternly. Three strikes, Tommy struck out.

"I do want it," Tommy said, ashamed, "…I was sober until tonight. I hadn't had a drink for a week. I was going to them damn meetings everyday, but then today I saw you and Andy walking and I thought about how much I missed her, how much I hated that she hated me, how much I was going to miss out on."

"So you went to the bar, to drink, which is what got you in this mess in the first place. That makes perfect sense," Sam rolled his eyes, "…great logic, Tommy. Really."

"I can't do this on my own and I'm asking for your help," Tommy pleaded.

"I'll be right back." Sam exited the room and found Monica not to far from the room, "…can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Sure," Monica said, walking away and waving for him to follow, "…talk."

"He's an alcoholic," Sam started to explain.

"I assumed that much, very few people can down that much alcohol and manage consciousness to talk about it," she said, judgmentally.

Sam shrugged it off because he knew she was right, "…he needs help. He's going to go through DT's, he's going to crave it and I will do my best to be here whenever I can to help, but his daughter can't know about this."

"What a solid relationship you have," Monica said, sarcastically, "…daddy and boyfriend conspiring against her, I'm sure she's a very happy woman."

"Cut the smartass attitude, okay?" Sam shouted, and then realized he was causing a scene. He pinched the bridge of his nose and looked down to the floor in an attempt to regain composure, "…look, you don't know anything about my life right now, or hers, or his. Their relationship can't take another blow, she can't take another blow. He is trying to clean up, for her and if I have to hold his hand through the whole damn process, I will, because _she's_ worth it. So, if you want to make this about more than the issue at hand, I'd like another nurse because I really don't have the time, or patience, to deal with it."

Sam walked away and walked back into Tommy's room, who was asleep so he decided to run to get coffee in anticipation of a very long nap on Tommy's part.

* * *

Andy turned over, only to find the other side of the bed empty. She opened her eyes, and looked at the clock. 9:19am, "…Sam?" she called, figuring he would be in the kitchen.

When nobody responded she proceeded to look for him, but all she found was note on the coffee machine, where Sam knew she would go the second she woke up. _I think he knows me to well. _

_Andy,_

_Had to go to the hospital. I'll explain when I get back._

_Hospital? _Andy began to panic as she dialed Sam's number.

"Good morning," Sam answered cheerfully.

"Hospital?" Andy questioned.

"I'm fine, I promise but I gotta go, I will explain it all when I get home."

He hung up before Andy had a chance to ask another question. He refused to lie to her anymore but he could not tell her the truth; therefore, he just wouldn't tell her anything, until he absolutely had to.

* * *

Sam wondered if someone was there to help his father, if he had even asked for help.

Part of him knew that's why he needed to help Tommy, because he knew what it was like to be in Andy's shoes and if he could prevent her from feeling the pain he had felt, he would do whatever he had to do.

The other part had always looked up to Tommy; he had admired his strong-will and ability to think through just about any situation. To see a man who had lead such a reputable life, done so many amazing things, just lie there helplessly on the hospital bed was simply, heartbreaking.

Sam felt as if he were eight-years-old and someone told him that Superman wasn't real. In his eyes, the officers who trained him were heroic and to see one of them broken, first hand, was an awful lot for him to accept.

"What's on your mind, Swarek?" Tommy said, catching Sam off-guard.

"You, actually," Sam said, knowing that was probably the most honest thing he had said all day.

"Well, don't I feel special," Tommy responded.

"Do you really want this, Tommy? I mean, really want it because I will help you. I'll stand by your side, hold your hand, do whatever I need to do, but only if you truly want to beat this," Sam said, hardheartedly.

Tommy remained silent for a moment, then looked out the window, "…you know, when Andy's mom left, I was crushed. I was left there with this little girl, who depended on me for everything, but you know what? That was okay, because she was my world. I loved that little girl more than anything; she had me wrapped around her finger. But, then she got older and the stress of being a single dad and cop, it was…overwhelming and the only thing that made it seem even the slightest bit normal was booze," he paused in an attempt to hold back tears.

"It wasn't bad at first, just a couple beers after shift, but it escalated quickly. I would come home at 3am to find my thirteen-year-old daughter waiting up for me because she was worried and sometimes I couldn't even remember how I got home. I missed her first day of junior high, her eighth grade graduation, her high school graduation, her prom, first date. All those things parent's look forward to, I missed because of my own selfish ways," Tommy couldn't hold the tears back any longer.

"It's not worth it, Sammy. It's not worth it. I cannot miss out on the rest of my daughter's life because of something so useless, something that will kill me. Andy means the world to me, I still love her more than anything and she still has me wrapped around her finger. Not only am I doing this for myself, I'm doing it for her because she deserves to be happy, she deserves to have a father that doesn't constantly let her down, a father she can be proud of. She deserves better than what I have become."

Sam had no words, as he was completely taken aback by Tommy's honesty.

"I need you to do something for me," Tommy said.

"A-an-anything," Sam answered, stumbling over his words.

"Tell Andy that I love her," Tommy requested.

"She knows, but I'll tell her."

"Thank you, now why don't you go on home. Andy's going to get worried," Tommy said, almost demandingly.

"Get some rest, Tommy," Sam said, with a chuckle as he exited the room, "…I'll be back later."

* * *

Andy was cleaning incessantly when Sam walked in the door, her way of coping with stress, "…I think I should stress you out more often. I don't think this house has ever been this clean!"

"I'm glad you think this is funny! What have you been doing? Why were you at the hospital?"

"I was with your dad," he said, awaiting her reaction.

"My dad? What'd he do?" she asked.

"He was in an accident," Sam said, trying to avoid all the details.

"Is he okay?" Sam could hear the fear in her voice.

"He's going to be alright," Sam said.

"Wait, why'd they call you?"

"I guess he told them to, he told me to tell you that he loves you, too."

Andy started cleaning again, it was her way of saying the conversation was over.

It had seemed like in the past week or so, two people who thought they knew each other realized that they really had no clue and that had only brought them closer. However, when it came to her feelings toward her father, Andy's thoughts were locked, air tight, and it seemed as if someone had thrown away the key. Just when he thought they were getting somewhere, she clams up on him again. _Go figure._

_

* * *

_

**A/N: **As always, let me know what you think!


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: **Okay,okay! My sincerest apologies for the delay! I also promised you the "big" chapter, but that'll be next chapter because this one was getting massive in length, so this is more or less the boring blah, blah that gets us where we need to be. I'm not sure how happy I am with it and I probably owe that to the fact that I wasn't incredible thrilled while I was writing it, though now I am in a great mood since I just re-watched the Rookie Blue Season 1 Pilot, with a live re-tweet on Twitter! Enough of my rambling, here you go!

Disclaimer: I own nothing Rookie Blue.

CHAPTER 11

Andy wanted to talk to her dad, she missed him but part of her was afraid of being hurt even more, "…I don't think I could take it if he didn't actually go through with it this time."

Sam sat up in the bed, confused, "…what?"

"That's why I ignore him, the situation; I can't take the disappointment if he fails," Andy said. This was not a conversation Sam had imagined happening in the early morning hours, and it was most certainly not what he thought he would wake up to.

"Have you slept at all?" Sam asked.

"No, I can't," Andy answered, facing Sam.

"I don't waste my time with people, you know that. I wouldn't help him if I didn't think he genuinely wanted to sober up," Sam stated.

She knew Sam was right; he wouldn't have helped him if he thought he didn't want to help himself, but Andy had been down this road several times before and it always ended with the same old song and dance. She wanted Sam to be right, but past events said he wasn't.

Her mind was made up; she was going to have to see for herself. She had to go see him, but not yet. She needed to give it some time

* * *

"How is she, Swarek?" Tommy asked, as he sat down at the table with Sam who visited him daily, sometimes twice.

"She's good, she's good. Even on her weakest days, she gets a little bit stronger," Sam answered.

They were entering week four of Tommy's treatment, he was half way through detox, but only a fourth of the way through his 12-week in patient program. "How are you feeling today?" Sam asked.

"I feel alright today, almost good," he told him. "It's rough, but I'll get through it."

"Andy, she, uh…" Sam paused in deliberation; unsure if now was the time to tell Tommy what he was about to say, "…she wants to come see you."

Tommy stared at Sam in silence for a few minutes before responding, "…no."

Sam sat back in his seat with a look of disbelief on his face, he took a deep breath and leaned forward, "…did you just say no?"

"I did."

"They're willing to allow Andy to come see you, why would you turn that down?" Sam asked.

"I want to get better before I see her again," Tommy stated. That was something Sam could respect. There visit quickly ended when Tommy was whisked away by a nurse to his support meeting, leaving Sam to contemplate their conversation in the common room.

"He's doing great," Monica said, startling Sam.

"What are you doing up here?" Sam asked.

"I've been keeping an eye on him, making sure he's really getting the care he deserves," she said, sitting down on the seat across from Sam.

"Thanks, for that."

"No problem, it's my job," she added, "…so how's Andy?"

"She's doing better; she finally went back to work. Some normalcy has been restored," Sam said with a chuckle. He found the idea of normalcy in the life of a McNally to be a bit ironic.

"You know, you and Andy are all he talks about. Makes me think I really dodged a bullet with you, so to speak," Monica said with a smile.

Sam rolled his eyes and shook his head, "…don't believe everything you hear."

"No, in all honesty though, my conversations with Tommy have done nothing but make me realize what I lost," she sighed, standing up; "…Andy's a lucky woman, to have both you and Tommy."

* * *

"You've had that goofy smile on your face all day, what gives?" Traci said, opening up her locker.

"Sam is taking me to St. Catherines to meet his mom and sister this weekend," Andy replied.

"Really? Things are getting pretty serious with you two, huh?"

Andy grabbed her bag and sat down on the bench, "…it's weird, you know, we didn't really date or go through the awkward _'What are we?'_ stage. We basically just moved in together, or rather, I moved in with him."

_Did we rush things?_ Andy thought to herself, having never talked about her relationship with Sam aloud in this capacity before. _No._ She quickly calmed herself down; Sam was the only thing she had been completely sure of in a long time.

"It makes sense though, you and Swarek, you make sense. It was inevitable, everybody knew it"

"It wasn't that obvious," she argued.

"No, Andy, it was! It is! You and Sam have had this oddly close relationship from day one, it's never been just a TO/Rookie relationship, it's always been so much more than that," Traci explained.

She couldn't have been closer to the truth, Andy knew that her relationship with Sam had never been normal and she knew they had always been _more than friends_. It was just unspoken, and complicated.

"You ready?" Sam said, covering his eyes as he peaked into the locker room.

"We're dressed," Traci said.

Sam uncovered his eyes, "…we need to get on the road if we want to make it there by 7."

"Yeah, just give me two seconds."

"Okay, I'm going to go wait in the truck," Sam exited and Andy continued to pack her things.

"Andy," Traci said, as Andy made her way to the door, "…I'm glad you're happy."

"Thanks, Trace. See you Monday!"

* * *

They were almost there when Andy started to get anxious and the silence became to much for her to endure, "…you know, there aren't a lot of things I remember that my mother told me but I do remember one time, I was upset because they boy I had a crush on, he told me I was _icky,_ and at like 8 you take icky to heart. She sat me down and said that someday someone would come into my life and make me realize why none of my other relationships worked. Good ol' mom was right about one thing."

"I'd never call you icky," Sam sad with a smirk.

Andy shifted in her seat again, "…why are you so antsy?" Sam asked.

"I'm nervous," Andy answered, biting her nails.

"I promise, it'll be fine," Sam said as they pulled in the driveway, "…just be yourself."

Sam grabbed Andy's hand as they walked towards his mother and sister. She pulled him closely and whispered, "…I love you."

Sam stopped and looked at her, that was the first time she'd said it and it sounded even better than he had imagined.

* * *

**A/N: **As always, let me know what you think! I will do my very best to get the next chapter up soon!


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: **My sincerest apologies for the delay! It's the end of the semester and I've had things thrown at me from left and right. This chapter is short (very short), but important, and a surprisingly happy one amongst the sad/depressing/complex ones.

Disclaimer: I own nothing Rookie Blue.

CHAPTER 12

"Mom, Sarah, this is Andy, Andy this is my mom, Holly and my sister, Sarah," Sam said, still stuttering as he processed Andy's three little words.

"It's great to meet you, we've heard quite a bit about you," Holly said.

"All good, I promise," Sarah added with a smile, holding a baby on her hip.

"Uncle Sammy!" a young boy yelled as he came running down the stairs.

"Logan, how are ya buddy?" Sam said as he bent down to catch him.

"You never told me you were an uncle," she stated.

"I didn't? Hm. I thought I'd mentioned it at some point."

"I definitely would've of remembered that," Andy said, "…so Logan and?"

"This shy girl here is Emme," Sarah said.

"Why don't we head inside? It's getting chilly," Holly said, linking arms with Andy, leading her in front of Sam and Sarah.

"I knew she was special," Sarah said with a smirk.

"What do you mean?" Sam asked coyly, as if he didn't know exactly what she meant.

"You never bring women home, Sammy," she snapped, "…ever."

"Yeah, well, I wanted you and mom to meet her."

"You trust her, too."

"What makes you say that?"

"You told her about dad," she answered quietly.

"I've told people about dad, Sarah."

"But, you told Andy the truth," Sarah added.

His dad had never been an off-limits topic, being off-limits wasn't really possible. Family is a pretty general subject, people are going to ask but usually, Sam's explanation was that his father died of a heart attack and that was that. He had only told two people the truth of his own free will, Oliver and Andy.

* * *

Holly already had Andy sitting down with a plate of food in front of her, "…mom, really? Do you have to feed everyone the second they come in the house?" Sam said.

Holly responded by turning around and handing him a plate of food, knowing full well that it would shut him up.

Sam was completely amazed at how well the three most important women in his life got along. They were talking and laughing together like they'd known each other for years. Right now, his world seemed almost perfect.

Sam sat in the swing watching as Andy played basketball with Logan, "…she's a keeper, Sammy," Holly said, as she sat down in the empty seat next to him.

"Ya think? She's a piece of work, that's for sure," Sam replied, with a chuckle.

"Well, she must be special or you wouldn't of brought her home," she said, knowing she was right.

Sam was silent for a moment; there were a few reasons that had prompted his visit. One, he wanted Andy, Sarah and his mom to meet. Two, he missed them. Finally, three, he had something to ask his mother, something he needed to ask in person.

"She is, very special," Sam said, under his breath.

Holly watched as Sam stared at Andy, "…you've been through a lot with her."

Sam nodded, "…can I ask you a question?"

"Of course," she said, even though she had a pretty good guess what he was going to ask.

"Do you think I could get grandma's ring?"

Holly reached into her the pocket of her hoodie and pulled out a little black velvet box that she proceeded to open, revealing the vintage diamond ring, "…I thought you'd never ask," she said with a smile as she handed the box to Sam.

* * *

Sam sat on the bed, flipping open the little black velvet box. _Such a tiny box shouldn't mean this much_, he thought to himself.

When he heard the shower shut off he took one last look at the ring; simple, but elegant and the perfect size. He could see it on her, but that was going to have to wait. _It's just not time yet. _As of right now, an engagement wasn't in the cards. _Soon though. _

Sam walked up behind Andy as she stood in front of the bathroom mirror. Sam's hand met hers as she ran her fingertips over the scar on her left shoulder. He grasped her hand tightly, "…you're beautiful," he whispered in her ear, "and I love you, too."

* * *

**A/N: **Let me know what you think! The next chapter is in the works and I will update just as soon as it's finished. It will have more Sarah/Holly in it too, because there is no way I'm leaving it at this. If all goes as planned, 13 will be up this weekend.

.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: **This chapter came together rather quickly, so I didn't make you guys wait too long! I will work at 14, but I'm in the home stretch of the semester, 2 weeks before finals so no promises!

Disclaimer: I own nothing Rookie Blue.

CHAPTER 13

Andy stared up at the ceiling, watching the blades of the fan go round and round. She tried to watch just one, without blinking; but frustration took over when she kept losing it in the mix. There were forty-two tiles vertically on the floor, thirty-two horizontally, five drawers in the dresser, twelve books on the bookshelf and eleven different kinds of flowers in the vase on the bedside table. _How is everyone still asleep?_

She listened for any tiny inkling of movement in the hallway and there was none.

"Sam?" she whispered, and received no response.

"Sam?" she said a little louder, and poked him.

"Hm?" he grunted, in response without opening his eyes, his face still half buried in the pillow.

"Sam?" she said one more time, this time prompting him to peek open one eye.

"Huh?" he replied.

"Wake up," Andy said, cheerfully.

Sam chuckled as he sat up, "…for the past two days you've woken up before me and I found you in the kitchen with my sister. Today though, you insist on waking me up?"

"Nobody's awake yet, and I've counted everything humanly possible. Do you know how awkward it is to be the only one awake? Afraid to make any kind of movement because you might wake up someone else? That's a lot of pressure, and knowing my luck, I'd probably be so worried about not making noise that I'd not pay attention to where I was walking, trip and fall down the stairs," she said, seriously.

"Andy," he said, rolling his eyes.

"Don't _Andy_ me, you know it could happen. It would happen."

"You woke me up…" he stated.

"Only after I ran out of things to count!" she exclaimed.

"Five bucks says they're all awake, but they're being quiet so they don't wake us up," Sam said, with a smirk.

"Ha. Fat chance, I haven't heard a peep!" Andy said, sure of herself.

Sam stood up and walked out the door, Andy followed and much to her dismay, in the kitchen stood Sarah, her husband Matt, Logan was sitting at the table and Emme was in the playpen, "…what did I tell you? It's like a vicious circle."

"Good morning, sleepyheads!" Sarah said, placing two more plates at the table.

Andy and Sam sat down, Logan quickly jumped onto Uncle Sammy's lap and began explaining the history of Lego's, in a five-year-old's perspective, which she found particularly entertaining.

"What time do you guys' have to hit the road?" Matt asked, setting the paper down.

"Probably around 4, I have to work tonight," Sam said, as he focused on the Lego tower he was building with Logan.

"You're working tonight? Since when?" Andy asked.

"Since Oliver called and asked to switch me shifts, he's working for me tomorrow morning."

Andy quickly text Traci and asked her to come over tonight, since she hadn't had a real chance to talk to her best friend. Traci jumped at the chance.

"Mom will be here soon, she wants to go to the park. Cook-out and all that, so after you eat, if you want to shower or anything, you better do so before she gets here, because as you know there is now slowing that woman down once she gets started," Sarah put food on everyone's plate, then sat down to her own.

One of the many things Andy had learned this weekend: Swarek's love to feed you. Sam was the same way, awesome cook that would gladly show off his skill to anyone with a mouth. She even found that her jeans were feeling tight; a small price to pay for a weekend with a loving, functional family, something Andy had begun to lose faith in.

* * *

The sun was out, the sky was blue and Sam could not think of a better way to spend his Sunday: playing baseball in the park with his nephew, surrounded by the most important people in his life. Part of him didn't want to go home; he didn't want to go back to reality. He wanted to stay here, because this, to him, was better than any vacation.

He watched as Andy sat on the blanket with Sarah, and he couldn't help but wish he knew how to read lips. _They're laughing, that has to be a good sign. _In his gaze, he missed the ball Logan had thrown him, "…Uncle Sammy! What was that?"

"Sorry buddy!" he said, tossing the ball back to him. He stared a moment more, than refocused his attention to Logan.

* * *

"It's like I'm spinning, you know? When you're a kid, you put your arms out and spin? Your body tells you to stop before you fall, but you just keep going. That's how I feel, all the time. Except with Sam, I know he won't let me fall," Andy said, her gaze locked on Sam.

Sarah smiled, "…for the first time, he seems genuinely happy. I owe that to you."

Andy didn't know what to say, mainly because she didn't know what she had done, but she did know that for the first time in a long time, she too, was genuinely happy and she owed that to Sam.

"Promise me something?" Sarah said to Andy.

Andy nodded, unsure how to answer.

"Make Sammy visit more, we miss him, and we're going to miss you," she said, still smiling.

"Absolutely," Andy answered, knowing she was going to miss them too; regardless of when she met them, because they were already beginning to feel like family.

* * *

"So, how's your dad?" Traci asked, curling up on the couch.

"I've only talked to him on the phone briefly, he definitely sounds better. Sam say's he looks better," Andy said, sipping her glass of wine.

"You mean, you haven't gone to see him yet?"

"He told Sam he doesn't want to see me until he's better, I can respect that and you know, truthfully, it's better that way because I don't really want to set myself up for disappointment if he doesn't follow through, you know?" she replied.

"It makes sense, I guess," Traci answered, "…so since when does Swarek work the late shift?"

"He said he switched shifts with Oliver, something about Zoey being out of town and him needing to be there with the girls."

"How was meeting the family?" Traci asked with a giggle.

"I'm surprised it took you this long to ask," Andy said, "…it was incredible. They're incredible, he has got a nephew, named Logan and a niece, named Emme, and he's great with them. They were so welcoming," Andy said. She looked over at the picture of all of them on the mantle, "…even after everything they've gone through, they're still such a strong, happy family. I wasn't sure that was even possible anymore."

"Sounds like you really had a good time!"

"I did, I did," Andy said. _And I kind of can't wait to go back._

* * *

Sam sat down at the desk, paperwork scattered in front of him; paperwork that could wait until next shift because it was 4am and he was going home to sleep in his own bed.

His locker didn't house a lot but the second he opened it, he couldn't help noticing the little black box in the far corner. It was the only place he could hide it from Andy. He grabbed the box and opened it, "…you know, Sammy, you and I, we're in love with two very different people," Luke said.

Sam quickly turned around, "…what's that supposed to mean?"

"I mean, the Andy you love, and the Andy I love, they are polar opposites, makes you really wonder which one is real. Food for thought."

"What are you doing in here anyway?" Sam asked.

"I, uh, came to tell you that the tip you gave me earlier, it panned out. Thanks for that," he answered.

"Yeah, anytime buddy," Sam said, sarcastically, heading towards the door, "…you know, Callaghan, maybe the _Andy_ you love, isn't Andy at all. It was just the _Andy _that you wanted her to be. The _Andy_ that was convenient for you. I don't know, food for thought?"

Sam walked out confidently, with only two things on his mind, Andy and his bed.

* * *

**A/N: **As always, let me know what you think!


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: **First of all, let me apologize for that wait! I am so sorry! I was stressing with finals, but their done! I'm officially finished with Spring 2011 semester! This chapter didn't exactly come out how I had planned, but it works just the same.

Disclaimer: I own nothing Rookie Blue, or Tracy Chapman, for that matter.

CHAPTER 14

Sam woke up in cold sweats after a night of tossing, turning and contemplation of Callaghan's words…_the Andy you love, and the Andy I love, they are polar opposites, makes you really wonder which one is real. _

It wasn't that he doubted Andy or the way he felt for her, he just wanted to know what Luke had really meant. Truth was, the only reason he cared was because of what had prompted it; because Luke had seen the ring.

He noticed a note on the refrigerator as he reached for the orange juice.

_Meet me at the Penny after shift, its karaoke night!_

_Love, Andy_

Sam grabbed the orange juice and shut the fridge. _Hah. Fat chance._ _I don't sing._

Like he did every morning, he called Tommy to see how he was doing. He was almost half way through his program and the last thing Sam wanted was for him to fall off the bandwagon when he had already made it this far. Today though, the conversation had gone a direction Sam hadn't expected.

"I had a visitor early this morning, Swarek," Tommy said.

"Really? Who was it?" Sam inquired, thinking that nobody really knew he was in rehab.

"Luke."

"Callaghan came to see you?" he stuttered, nearly choking on his cheerios.

"Sure did, bright and early too. He said he wanted to see how I was doing," he answered.

"Right, yeah, I'm sure that's exactly why he showed up," Sam said, sarcasm heavy.

"That's what I thought, so I told him to beat it," Tommy replied with a chuckle, prompting the ear-to-ear grin on Sam's face. "But before he left, he made a point to tell me that he spotted you with a particular kind of ring."

Sam's grin quickly dissipated, "…so, this ring, Swarek. You want to fill me in."

"It's what you think it is, I haven't asked her though. I want to wait for the right time and I wanted to ask your permission. I hadn't had a chance yet because I just got the ring from my mom when we went to visit," Sam explained.

"You've certainly got my blessing, but if you can, could you give me some kind of warning before you do it?"

"No problem, Tommy."

Truth was, Sam had a good idea of when he planned to propose, he just was not ready to share that plan with anybody just yet.

* * *

"Are you going to the Penny tonight?" Traci asked Andy as they changed back into their street clothes.

"Yeah, I think I am," she said, as she sat down to change her shoes, "…I told Sam to meet me there."

"Sam Swarek? At karaoke night? Wishful thinking much?" Gail snapped.

Both Andy and Traci rolled their eyes, shrugging Gail's comment off, "…so I'll see you there then?" Traci asked, as she started toward the door.

"See you there," Andy replied, taking her hair down. She noticed Gail staring at the scar, "…what?"

"I'm sorry, I-I didn't mean to stare," Gail said, quickly looking away.

"Of course you did, Gail. That's just the way you are, so go ahead, spit it out."

"How are things, with your dad, I mean?" she asked hesitantly.

"Truthfully? I haven't talked to him. He's in rehab, he's got just under six weeks left," Andy said, refusing to make eye contact.

"Why haven't you talked to him?" Gail asked, well aware of the line she was about to step over.

"He doesn't want to talk to me, not until he's finished anyway," she responded.

"Then, how do you know he's really doing it?"

"Sam talks to him, everyday."

"You know, Andy, I know you and I aren't exactly friends, but if you need anything, or just need to talk, I'm here," she said, Andy began to speak but Gail stopped her, "…you've got Traci, Sam, Dov, Chris, yeah, I know. It's just sometime you may want an outsider's opinion or an unbiased thought, and well, I'm just here if you need it," she smiled.

"Thanks, Gail. That means a lot."

"Don't mention it. I'll see you at the Penny," she said, walking through the locker room door. Andy stood up, tossed her stuff in her locker and looked at the picture of her and her father, the one that she didn't tear up. _I miss him._

* * *

As the night progressed and the beer kept flowing, Sam became increasingly more gullible, "…please, just one song!" Andy pleaded.

"I don't sing, Andy! Never have, never will," he stated as seriously as he could, however he couldn't help cracking a smile.

"Please Sam, just one song and I promise, I'll never ask you to do this again."

Sam looked at the crowd in the bar. _I do not care how drunk I am, I am not getting on that stage._

"Pleeeeeaaaaasseee?" Andy asked, one more time as she rocked back and forth.

"I say, we call it a night," Sam said.

"Really, Sam? Really?"

Sam pulled Andy closer, pushing her hair behind her ear and kissing her, "…I just want to go home and be with you."

He smiled, knowing his dimples were like kryptonite, so reluctantly Andy backed off and agreed to go home.

"We walking?" he asked, handing her jacket to her.

"Yeah, it's nice out," she answered.

They left the Penny and they walked, hand in hand, down the street, "…are you really upset that I wouldn't sing with you?"

"Kind of, yeah," Andy said, "…it's not really a big deal; I just thought it'd be fun."

Andy could here music playing from a nearby apartment, music she was sure someone would complain about which would lead to one of the annoying public disturbance calls they hated so much.

"You got a fast car, but is it fast enough so we can fly away? We gotta make a decision, we can leave tonight or live and die this way," Sam sang.

Andy stared for a moment, in complete shock that he had just broken out in song, "…this isn't a musical, you know?"

"The speed so fast I felt like I was drunk, city lights lay out before us and your arm felt nice wrapped 'round my shoulder," he continued to sing, "…and I had a feeling that I belonged. And I had a feeling I could be someone, be someone, be someone."

"Sam, really? Right here? In the middle of the street?" Andy asked, almost in a panic as Sam continued to sing, forcing her to dance. She couldn't hide the smile any longer, she giggled as Sam twirled her and finally, she joined him, "…You got a fast car, but is it fast enough so you can fly away? You gotta make a decision. You leave tonight or live and die this way."

As the song ended, Sam pulled Andy closer, "…how's that for karaoke?"

"Better than I could have ever imagined," she said, with her smile from ear to ear, "…but you know what would be better?"

Sam looked puzzled. She leaned in to kiss him and said, "…you and I, in our bed."

"Now that sounds like a great way to end our night."

And so, they continued to walk, hand in hand, down the street, as if nothing happened. Except now, the smiles on their faces could be seen a mile away.

* * *

**A/N: **As always, let me know what you think! Reviews are my motivation to keep writing and update sooner!


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY.** Here's what happened: my computer crashed, completely. I had to get a new one, but as you all know that takes money. I saved the money and bought the computer, and finally got a Chapter 15! It's not the longest, or the most interesting but it's necessary. Please forgive me for the awful delay.

CHAPTER 15

"You've been smiling all day, what's up?" Gail said, with a grin.

"Things are just…just good. Great, actually. I'm just really happy," Andy responded.

"That's good Andy, you deserve it," she replied, leaving Andy in a state of shock, "…what? I'm capable of being nice! But if there is one thing I've learned it's that being nice doesn't always get you where you want to be, not in the world of law enforcement anyway."

"Can I ask you something?" Andy said.

"Go for it."

"I'd ask him, but it doesn't really matter and I don't want to mess things up over something that isn't important. Out of sheer curiosity…"

"Spit it out, Andy!"

"The night that I saw you and Sam leave the Penny together, did anything…" Andy quieted, awaiting a reaction from Gail.

"Oh, no, no. Nothing has ever, or would have ever happened between Swarek and I. I may be a lot of things Andy, but a home-wrecking, man stealer isn't one of them!" Gail replied quickly.

"He was single though."

"If you want to get all technical about it."

"And I was with Luke," Andy stated.

"Andy, you and I both know that Swarek hasn't been 'single' since he met you. We'll just leave it at that," Gail said.

* * *

Sam sat down in Jerry's office, waiting for Andy to get back to the barn.

"I need to ask you something," he said to Jerry, who responded by looking up from his paperwork.

"What's up, Sammy?"

"You went out a couple times with Andy when she was with Callaghan, right?"

"Sammy, I'm not gonna go there, you want to know about Luke and Andy, talk to Luke or Andy," Jerry said, in an attempt to drop the subject.

"No, no, here me out. Luke saw me with a ring, and he said something that," Sam paused, unsure if he wanted this conversation to continue, "…something that shouldn't have bugged me but it did. He went on some spiel about how the Andy he loves and the Andy I love are complete opposites, that you have to wonder which one is real."

"You know Callaghan, he's probably just fired up that you got Andy and he didn't."

"Maybe, but you're awfully quick to say that," Sam said, suspicious.

"Look, I've definitely witnessed two versions of McNally, but I noticed that before you got with her. She was always different with Luke. You want my opinion, you've got the real Andy. She tried so hard to be what Luke wanted that she lost herself along the way," Jerry hesitated, then resumed looking through his papers, "…and that's all I've got to say on the matter."

He needed someone to reinforce what he thought, he needed to hear it from someone else; and now that he had, things could get back to normal. Well, as normal as they had been. If there was one thing he knew for sure, it was this relationship with Andy was anything but normal.

* * *

The Penny was crawling with the regulars, Andy was surrounded by familiar faces, some more familiar then others. Then she spotted a face she'd never come across before: long blonde hair, blue eyes and more importantly, a more than familiar arm around her waist.

"Trace, whose the girl with Luke?" Andy asked, pointing her out.

"I think it's Detective Grant," she said hesitantly.

"Grant? The IA detective?" Andy said, nervously. Nothing good had ever come from an unfamiliar Internal Affairs detective.

"Yeah, Jerry said she was going to be spending some time at Fifteen. Something about Superintendent Peck thinking we're all too comfortable with our division IA reps, that we're getting sloppy."

"Wonderful," she added, downing the rest of her drink.

_Just keep your distance, you're not with Luke. You're with Sam and you're happy. Don't screw it up. _

She had to keep telling herself that, and not because it was a lie, because she felt she had a right to know who this woman was and why her ex-fiancé had his arm around her. Which was completely bogus and she knew that, she certainly wouldn't feel as though her relationship with Sam was any of Luke's business if they didn't all work out of the same division.

Andy walked up to the bar to order another drink, when she bumped into someone, "…excuse me, I'm sorry. I can be such a klutz…oh, hi."

"You're Andy McNally right?" the tall, blonde asked.

"Yeah."

"It's nice to meet you, I'm Lindy Grant. I've been trying to find you all day, we need to talk," she said, picking her whiskey sour up off of the bar.

"We do?" Andy asked, befuddled.

"Yeah, we do. How about you meet me in my office after parade tomorrow?"

"Uh, okay. Sure thing," Andy said, prompting Grant's immediate departure. She couldn't help watch as she bee-lined to Luke, quickly resuming their previous position.

Andy's focus changed swiftly when she felt someone come up behind her, "….and where have you been all night?" she asked Sam.

"Watching you, well for last few minutes anyway. What'd Grant want?" Sam replied.

"You know her?"

"I've tangoed with IA a few times, so I know of her. I met her briefly this morning, why'd you answer my question with a question?" he snapped. That was a pet peeve they both shared and often utilized.

"She said she needs to talk to me, I have to meet with her after parade tomorrow."

"Did you do something?" he quickly stated.

"Not that I know of…"

"Andy, IA doesn't get involved for just anything," Sam said, as he turned to look at Grant, "…does is have to do with Callaghan?"

"Sam, I really have no idea," Andy's gaze met Lindy's. Something told her tomorrow just wasn't going to be a good day.

* * *

**A/N: **Keep a look out for 16, it'll be up soon. As always, reviews are not necessary but loved & appreciated. Also don't be to harsh on grammar & spelling with this one, I didn't get a chance to proof it, I'm just excited to get it up!


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N:** SOOOOOOO SORRY that this has taken such an awful long time! I'm shooting to finish the story completely today! I've been so crazy busy with school (in Nursing school you have a choice to make you can have 2 of three things: a social life/free time, good grades, enough sleep. I've chosen sleep & grades!) My sincerest apologies for how long this has taken! I, in no way, ever intended of leaving all of you hanging for as long as I did. It just seemed like every singe time I sat down to write, something came up!

CHAPTER 16

_Internal Affairs. _No investigation is ever open and shut, no stone is left unturned, no life left unshaken.

Andy had dealt with IA when she shot the serial killer last year; at least then she knew why she was dealing with IA. She'd hoped that was the only kind of business she'd ever have with IA, unfortunately, that didn't seem to be the case. It was wishful thinking anyway. She knew the description you would get from any detective in that department is that they're there to clear the name of good cops, and most of them are. However, there are a handful of them that get their kicks from watching cops squirm, from the power they know they hold. If her reputation proves to be true, Lindy Grant was one of those detectives and Lindy Grant wanted words with Andy.

* * *

Andy walked into Fifteen, more nervous than ever, only to find Detective Grant, waiting for her, "…why don't you follow me, McNally?" she said, leading Andy towards her office, "…take a seat."

"Did I do something wrong, Detective? I thought I was supposed to meet you after parade…" she asked, hesitantly.

"No, you didn't and you can call me Lindy. I realized last night I probably should've opened with that, I know when I was a cop, the second Internal Affairs came out of someones mouth, I immediately started to sweat. I'm sorry if I stressed you out, you can breathe," she said, in an attempt to relax Andy, "…I wanted to talk to you about your mother."

"My mom? What about her? Is she okay?" Andy said, panicked, although she wasn't exactly sure why she was panicked..

"She's fine. She wants to see you."

"Do you know her?" she asked.

"No, I don't. She contacted Detective Callaghan, because the last thing she heard about you from your dad was that you were living with him, he asked me to speak with you. He said he didn't want to put you in an awkward situation," Lindy added, "…here's her phone number. You can do with it what you'd like."

"Thank you," Andy said, standing up and exiting her walked straight across into Luke's office, quickly knocking before walking in, "..hey, thanks for that."

"I just did what anybody would do."

"After the things I said to you, I wouldn't have," she said, shutting the door.

"You were right though, and I'm working on it. Swarek's a great guy, he's lucky to have you. He deserves you," Luke said, packing the box on his desk up.

"Where are you going?" she asked.

"I'm transferring to Seventeen, since we solved the Martinelli case, I have nothing to keep me here. They have an opening so this is my last week here."

"What about Grant, er, I mean, Lindy?"

"What about her?" he added.

"Aren't you two, an item?" she stated awkwardly.

"Lindy and I? No. Never have been, never will be. She's not exactly my type, I like rookies, remember?" Luke said with a chuckle. Andy thought back to the conversation she had with Sam about Luke picking a rookie in every group, she knew it wasn't true but she still heckled him about it when they were together.

"How could I forget?" she said with a smile. Andy walked farther into Luke's office and picked up the picture of them in the snow on his desk.

"I really did love you, you know?" he said to her, staring at the picture, "…I don't know what happened, or when it happened. It was just like all of a sudden, everything fell apart."

"What's meant to be, will always be. Everything happens for a reason, that's one thing I did learn from my mother, along with the taking _icky_ to heart thing."

"_Taking "icky" to heart_?" Luke asked with a puzzled look on his face.

"Never mind," she said with a laugh, "…it's not going to be the same without you here."

"I may be back, you never know with this job." He started to tape up his boxes as Andy stood there, still holding the picture.

"No, you won't."

"You're probably right, but it's for the best. You've moved on with your life, now it's my turn and I can't do that here."

"It's time to start a new chapter," she said, stepping out of the office, Luke right behind her with his boxes. He reached up and took the nameplate off the wall.

"I think it's time to start a new book," he threw the nameplate in the box, "…so I guess I'll uh…see you around?"

"Yeah, maybe."

"Goodbye, Andy."

"Goodbye, Luke," she said, watching him walk out. _Maybe it really was time to start a new book, and maybe this time, it'll be simple._ Andy walked into the locker room and set the picture in her bag, then sat down and grabbed her cell phone and dialed the number Lindy had given her, only to press _END_ a millisecond later._ Do I even want to talk to her? Nothing she says is going to make me forgive her, why waste my time?_ She looked at the time, threw her phone in her pocket, slammed her locker shut and ran to parade.

* * *

Sam woke up and immediately looked at the clock. _Why didn't she wake me up?_ He picked up his phone, no missed calls. He scrolled down to a very familiar number and hit SEND.

"Hey Sammy, you're up early," Oliver said, chewing whatever it was he was having for breakfast.

"Hey, do you see Andy? Did she meet with Grant yet?"

"I don't know, I seen her talking with Callaghan though."

"Callaghan?" Sam said, confused.

"Yeah, she was talking to him before he left."

"Left?" Sam said, puzzled.

"He transferred to seventeen, he packed up his stuff. He's gone, Sammy," Oliver said, as if Sam should've known. The other end of the line was quiet as Sam contemplated Luke's transfer, "...Sammy, you there?"

"Yeah, um, if you see Andy, can you tell her to call me? Please?"

"Sure thing, buddy. Sure thing. Hey, Sammy?"

"Yeah?" he said, his finger on the END button.

"You arlight?" Oliver asked, worried.

"Yeah, I mean, I think I am," Sam answered, questioning himself, "...I'll talk to you later."

* * *

Andy got in the car with Traci, still staring at her phone, trying to decide whether she should put that number to good use or not, "...so, what gives? What'd she want with you Andy?" Traci asked, barely containing herself.

"She, uh, she just wanted to give me a phone number. Someone I knew contacted Luke and she was just the go between," Andy said, attempting to be vague on the details. She didn't know what she wanted to do yet, and she didn't really want other opinions fogging her own.

"Is Luke really gone?" she asked.

"Yeah, he is. I get it though, if the situation were reversed I wouldn't want to watch him with someone else," Andy said, empathetically.

"Trace, can we stop by Sam's?" she asked, qucikly so she'd spit it out before she changed her mind.

* * *

Traci pulled the patrol car into the driveway right behind Sam's truck, Andy jumped out, told Traci she'd be right back and ran into the house, "...Sam?"

"Andy?" he yelled from the shower, he quickly turned the water off, threw the towel around his waist and ran into the hallway, "..are you alright?"

"She gave me my mothers phone number."

"Who?" Sam asked, confused.

"Lindy Grant, she gave me my mothers phone number. She said that she contacted Luke, and Luke asked her to give it to me," she said, handing him the yellow post-it note with the smudged _Nicole Marshall-McNally_ written in Luke's chicken scratch on it.

"You don't have to call her, Andy," he said, knowing how hard it would be for Andy to do, "...but you can."

"What if I don't like what she has to say?" Andy said, panicked.

"Well, that's the beauty of it: if you don't like what she has to say, you don't ever have to talk to her again. That decision lies in your hands. Just keep in mind that if you don't call her, a case of the _what if's_ never really goes away."

He handed the post-it note back to her and, reluctantly, she took it. She dialed the number and hit SEND. Sam watched as her shaking hand put the phone up to her ear. He grabbed her other hand and stood there with her as she waited to hear a voice on the other end of the phone...

**A/N: **I completely understand if no one reads this, considering it's been so long since I've updated, but I'm trying to finish the story completely today!


	17. Chapter 17

CHAPTER 17

"Hello?" the woman on the other end said, her voice sounded the same as it did the day she left, "...hello? Is anyone there?"

"McNally, speak," Sam whispered.

"Hi," Andy said, "...is this Nicole?"

"Yes, who is this?"

"Andy-Andrea, your daughter."

Silence, complete silence fell over the entire house, until Traci honked the horn of the cruiser. Sam looked at Andy, she nodded and he went outside to tell Traci what was going on.

"Whoa, Swarek, who knew all that was under the uniform!" Traci said, jokingly.

"Ha-ha. She's on the phone, she'll be out in a minute."

"The number she got from Callaghan, was it her moms?" she asked, trying to confirm the feeling she had.

"Yeah," he said, then he hit the top of the car and walked back in. Andy met him at the door, "...so...?"

"We're going to dinner with her tonight," Andy said.

"We?" he asked.

"Yes, we, I know you didn't think I was going to go alone," she hugged him and then ran back to the car.

"I have to work tonight," he shouted as she opened the patrol car door.

"I'll talk to Best, we'll figure it out, I love you and I'll talk to you later."

"Be careful, I love you, too," he walked back into the house and shut the door.

* * *

"Your mother has expensive taste," Sam said as they sat outside The Fifth Grill, waiting for 7 o'clock to roll around.

"Just be thankful she isn't some tree-hugging vegeterian, then you'd really be screwed," Andy snapped back, smiling.

Sam grabbed her hand, "...just remember, if you feel uncomfortable, we can leave at any time. I'll get my steak with a to-go box."

Andy laughed, "...better get two of those!"

"Seriously though, you say the word and I'll start dying of a heart attack or having an allergic reaction to the steak that I will insist on taking with us."

"Okay," she replied.

"We need a word," Sam said, very seriously, "...it has to be something we can fit into a regular conversation."

"Conversation, I mean, when you're having a conversation, how often does the word conversation come up?" she said, encouraging his crazy.

"See, you are a genius, that's why I keep you around! Let's do this!"

* * *

They walked into the restaurant and told the hostess that they were meeting someone, "...follow me," she told them.

They followed, and every step closer they took, the more tense Andy got. Sam turned to her, "...one word, and we're gone. These are your terms, not hers. I'm right here." They got closer to the table and Andy could see her.

Dark hair, darker than her own, anyway; hazel eyes, beige skin, it was amazing how much she hadn't changed. As soon as she spotted them, she stood up, "...wow, Andrea, you are so beautiful."

"Thank you and Andy, I prefer Andy."

"Andy, sorry. Hi, I'm Nicole," she said, reaching her hand out to Sam.

"Sam," he said, shaking her hand quickly.

"Sit, sit, we have so much to talk about!

The conversation went from the weather, to their favorite movies, to Tommy, to Sam and finally, to Nicole's new family.

"How long have you been married?" Andy asked, eyeing the wedding band on her left hand.

"8 years, you have a half sister, her name is Taylor," Nicole said, hesistantly, "...Andy, I want you to know, that I regret leaving every day, but by the time I'd realized the mistake I made, I didn't feel I could come back. I'd already put you and your father through so much, I just tried to forget."

"Why change your mind now, then?"

"I'd always wanted to try and see you, but I know if I were you, I wouldn't want a thing to do with me. Taylor found a picture of you in my drawer, though, and I explained it to her. For a 10 year old she certainly has some insight. She told me to at least try, because at least then, I wouldn't live wondering _what if._"

Andy just looked at Sam, who had a smirk on his face.

"I don't expect you to forgive me, what I did was selfish and there are no excuses. All I want is a chance to get to know my amazing daughter," she said, with tears welling up in her eyes.

"I think we can give it a try," Andy said, reaching to hug Nicole.

* * *

A COUPLE WEEKS LATER:

Sam took off to work and Andy went to Dr. Graham's office. Andy agreed to go alone to the last appointment as long as Sam went to dinner with her. However, this time it was different, Andy was walking into the office with a new found confidence that she'd lost those months ago, "...you seem to be in a very good mood today!"

"You know what? I am. My dad is getting released from rehab tomorrow, I had dinner with my mother which helped me realize that her leaving had nothing to do with me, I'm with Sam and as happy as a girl can get."

"I'm glad to hear it, I spoke with Sgt. Best this morning and cleared you completely. You are officially able to ride alone, not that he'll let you, and you can work without restriction."

"Thank you, you know, I was so reluctant in the beginning, but you've really helped me," Andy said, softly.

"That's what I'm here for," Diane replied, "...now you remember that if you ever feel like you need someone else to talk to, you're more than welcome to call my office."

Andy left the office and went to pick up the _Welcome Home _cake for her dad with Traci.

"Things are finally starting to feel normal again," Traci said, fiddling with the apples, trying to pick a few to put in her bag.

"I think normal is hardly the right word. I went from living life one way, to having my life completely derail and then I boarded a plane instead of a train," Andy replied with a chuckle.

"But, you're happy right?"

"I'm the happiest I think I've ever been, but it's certainly not normal for me."

"I think you should get used to it, Sam's here to stay," Traci said, smiling.

* * *

She'd cleaned the entire house, picked up the guest room, changed the sheets and put fresh towels in the bathroom. She took all the food out, hung up the balloons and the _Welcome Home, Tommy_ sign. She hid all the liquor bottles and put all the beer behind the pop in the garage fridge. Sam walked in from work, threw his bag on the floor and took off his shoes, "...Sam Swarek, if you make a mess, I will hurt you," she yelled from the kitchen, putting the fear of God in him. He picked up the bag, and the shoes, putting them both away and then walked into the kitchen to see Andy cleaning and dancing to _Back At One_ on the radio. He walked up behind her, put his arms around her and said...

"Dance with me?" he whispered, grabbing her hand and spinning her into him.

"You are in an awfully good mood," she said with a smile.

"Who wouldn't be in a good mood if they just got off work and got to come home to you?"

"Oh, stop it."

"You're the only one for me, Andy. Coming home to you every day, that makes a life worth living. I love you, will you marry me?"

"What?"

Sam reached into his pocket, pulled out the small velvet box, got down on one knee and said, "...Andy, will you marry me?"

"Yes, of course," she said, tears starting to fall from her face, "...of course I'll marry you!"

Sam slid the ring onto her finger, he stood up and she threw her arms around him.

"We're engaged!" she said, still giddy, "...I can't believe it!"

* * *

Later on that night, Tommy pulled Andy aside, "...Andy, I want you to know that I mean it this time. No more drinking. I'm done. I realize that it wasn't just hurting me, it was hurting you, too and that wasn't fair. I am so sorry for what I've done to you Andy, what I've put you through, I'll never be able to forgive myself. I'm sober, and I'm going to stay sober, I promise."

"That's great, dad. I'm so proud of you, I really am," she said, hugging him.

"A little birdie tells me that my little girl is getting married," he said, mischeviously.

"You knew?" she asked.

"I knew he was going to ask you, yes, but I've been calling him my son-in-law for months now. The first time you talked to me about Sam Swarek, I knew. He loves you sweetie, more than you'll ever know."

"I think I have a pretty good idea," she said.

"I loved seeing everyone today, but I'm feeling pretty tired, I think I'm going to call it a night."

"Alright, I'll see you in the morning, Dad. I love you," she said, standing in the doorway.

"Love you too, bug. Goodnight."

Andy shut the door and walked back downstairs, "...where'd everyone go?"

"Well, your dad told Jerry he was getting tired, so everyone decided to go to the Penny so he wouldn't feel obligated to stay up because they were here, I told them that if you were up to it, we'd meet them there."

"Let's go!"

* * *

Sam and Andy walked hand-in-hand into the Penny, Sam whistled, getting everyone's attention, "...we have an announcement to make you guys, listen up!" Andy said.

"Spill it, you two!" Oliver yelled.

"We're getting married," Sam yelled, holding Andy's hand up!

"It's about damn time!" Frank yelled.

"You can say that again," said Jerry. Everyone congratulated them, bought them drinks and they were the talk of the night, but they couldn't have cared less. Sam's eyes were locked on Andy, and Andy's eyes were locked on Sam, "...forever?" Sam asked Andy.

"Forever."


	18. Epilogue

EPILOGUE:

Andy stood in front of the mirror and brushed her fingertips across the scar on her shoulder. That night, that moment changed her life forever. She zipped up the back of her white, beaded, strapless gown and picked up her flowers.

"You ready, baby girl?" Tommy said, standing in the door way.

"Let's do this!" she said. They linked arms and walked toward the double doors. She never thought she'd have her father there to walk her down the aisle, not sober anyway. It'd been sixteen months sober now, sixteen months and not a single drop of alcohol had passed through his lips.

The ushers opened the double doors and the guests all stood up and the first person she noticed was her mother and Taylor in the front row, but then her eyes were locked on one person, Sam. _He looks so hot in that tux._ _Don't trip, Andy. Don't trip._

Her father to her right, she walked down the aisle until she reached Sam, then the entire ceremony seemed to be a blur until it was time for the vows...

"Sam, two years ago you captured my heart by being exactly who you are. The sweetest, most loving and compassionate person I have ever known. You have been my very best friend through the good and the bad. You have been the reason that I smile and you have given comfort beyond measure when I have cried," Andy said, choking back the tears, "...you have believed in me when no one else would, and you have shown me how to love with passion, purity, and unconditional acceptance. I'm not sure a lifetime is long enough to return all you have given to me, but I promise the rest of my days I'll spend by your laugh with you and cry with you, to believe in you and support you. In poverty I promise to do everything to make our love rich, and in wealth to never let our love grow poor. Together we are better than we could ever hope to be alone, and today I give you my love, my trust, and my fidelity forever. You will always be the one that I want."

"When we first met, the thought of us together was crazy and impossible but it was so undeniable. Not a day went by that you didn't cross my mind and I didn't care how wrong it was. You've brought out the best in me, you've completed me and I can not imagine my life without you," he took a deep breath, "...you're strong and you're beautiful, inside and out. You've shown me what life is truly about and I want nothing more than to spend the rest of my days laughing with you, crying with you, supporting you and loving you, because you are my forever and today I give you all that I am. You will always be the best part of my day."

"Do you Sam, take Andy, to be your lawfully wedded wife? To have and to hold, to love and to cherish, through richer or for poorer, through sickness and in health, till death do you part?"

"I do," said Sam.

"Do you Andy, take Sam, to be your lawfully wedded husband? To have and to hold, to love and to cherish, through richer or for poorer, through sickness and in health, till death do you part?"

"I do," said Andy.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife, you may kiss the bride."

Sam lifted Andy's vail, and kissed her. When they separated and opened their eyes she looked at him and said, "...forever?"

"Forever," he replied.

"And for the very first time, Mr. & Mrs. Samuel Swarek!"

**A/N: **There will more than likely be a continuation to come since I'm getting antsy for season 3! Hope you enjoyed! Please don't be to harsh on grammar/editing because I was trying to finish this and didn't get to edit as well as I usually do.


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